Page 17 of Nanny for the Cowboy

The words sound confident, partly because I know that I am pretty content alone. I have Darby, and that’s all I really need.

But that’s the funny thing about this shitshow called life. I might be all I need, but some part of me isn’t convinced it’s all I want.

Are you kidding yourself? Date? Cuz someone is going to want to shackle herself to you? You’re a single dad and a fucking mess. No, no one wants that.

Heartbreak seems the much more likely outcome of all that, and I’ve had my fill of that.

Leo squints at me. “You say that. But as someone who’s lost his wife, let me just tell you that I don’t regret a single minute. The best years of my damn life, Brooks. And I’ll remember them fondly until it’s my turn to join her.”

My chest pinches at that thought, and I try not to consider the fact that the first person who popped into my head when Leo mentioned dating was his fucking daughter.

“I hear you, Leo. I’ll…” I see Clover’s stormy blue eyes in my head. “…think about it.”

“Good. Now I best be going. I have some farms to look at. Wish me luck.”

Shaking again, we pat each other on the shoulders. “Good luck, Leo. Let me know if you need anything.”

“I need you to take my advice, but I’m a patient man.” He claps me on the shoulder once more and then heads toward the door. “See you soon, bud.”

“See ya.”

SEVEN

Clover

Clover

“And I get Max and Dan to play with me when we can. It’s like work, though, to get us all online at the same time because Dad is like so strict about screen time.”

I smile as Darby pauses his stream of conversation to lick at his ice cream. If he talks for much longer, the thing is going to melt all over him.

“Well, your dad likes to be sure you’re getting your homework and chores done. He’s getting a little better about it, though. He let you play for a full hour last night.”

Darby nods, his tongue dragging up the side of his vanilla-chocolate twist, and he comes away with a fair amount all over his chin.

Laughing, I offer him a napkin from the picnic basket I brought to the park and then go back to laying on the large blanket we have sprawled out in the sun.

Hot as Satan’s taint was the choice phrase I heard at the store today, and as we lie here enjoying the afternoon, I have to admit that the lady at the register was right.

“I still don’t know why you guys are so obsessed with that game. It sounds boring to me. Don’t you just build stuff?”

“No!” Darby sounds truly offended by my reduction of Minecraft, and I giggle. “You can fight things and make factions too.”

“Okay, okay. Sorry to offend. I was always just more a fan of RPGs and puzzle games.”

Eyeing me, Darby squints, licking up his cone again. “You’re a Skyrim person, aren’t you?”

“Guilty.” I nod. “And Legend of Zelda.”

He sighs a little but does a poor job of hiding his grin. “Okay, well, those aren’t…terrible.”

“You forget, buddy. You let me borrow Skyrim the other day. I saw your logged hours, Mr. Twelve Fully Played Characters.”

Scoffing, Darby tries to play it off like he’s not that into it, that he’s the cool kid just like his friends, and I laugh, patting him on the knee.

“Buddy, I’m not going to tell anyone. Besides, someday, you’ll see that it doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks. It’s about doing what you enjoy, just for you.”

There’s a pause, and Darby finishes up his ice cream, using the napkin to mop up his hands and face the best he can.

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