Page 65 of Hide or Die

I couldn’t protect myself.

I was powerless to face this future on my own. The awareness of my own utter helplessness slammed into me like a hurtling boulder. I needed their strength because mine was gone, and it wasn’t fair to steal any more of Kam’s.

“Please, alphas,” I managed around a choked sob. “Oh, god. I don’t know what to do now. I don’t know what to do—”

Flynn settled onto his side, facing me. His thumb swiped over my cheek, wiping away the tear that had fallen. He scooted forward, one strong arm worming its way beneath me until my head was pillowed on his bicep. The other draped over my waist and settled on Kam’s hip, pulling us both snug against his body.

We were jostled lightly as another big body lay down behind Kam. Jax’s hand settled on my shoulder. Low rumbles vibrated around the nest—a pair of alpha purrs.

“I love you,odama,” Kam whispered against the bruised skin of my neck. “I know it feels like the world is ending, but I’ve done this before. I promise you, it’s really not.”

His lips pressed against my mating gland, and the last shreds of my control cracked. I huddled between the alphas and myodama, my entire body shaking with helpless, wracking sobs. All of the mastery I’d deluded myself into believing I held over my own life had been an illusion—and that realization hurt like knives flaying my skin.

The only shelter left to me lay in the small pack of misfits who’d somehow seen fit to save my sorry ass... and my packmate’s.

Kam knew this pain intimately—he’d experienced unimaginable horrors as a child. And yet, he’d managed to survive and grow into the beautiful omega I loved. I owed it to him to survive as well.

“Kam,” I choked out. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. This is all my fault.”

Kam only squeezed me tighter.

It was Jax who spoke. “It’s the fault of the world we live in. You were trying to change that world. There’s no blame in that. And maybe you can still change things... just in a different way.”

“Jax.” There was a hint of chiding in Flynn’s tone.

“I know, I know,” Jax said. “Anyway, that’s for tomorrow. Tonight, it’s okay to grieve. God knows, we’ve all got way too many things to mourn.”

My remaining strength dissolved like snow in a warm spring rain. With no barriers left to hide behind, I let the tears come, held close and protected by my pack that might have been.










TWENTY-FIVE

Jax

NO QUESTION about it—thesetwo were going to be our kryptonite. I’d thought as much in the cave in Romania, and seeing Flynn with them had confirmed it. The twisted part of it? In some ways, things had becomelesscomplicated now that their lives had been thrown into chaos.

Leona McCready would never have voluntarily given up her crusade to effect change from her post inside the Foreign Office. And, in my defense, I’d certainly never wanted to see her in this situation, even though something like this had been more or less inevitable. Her secret was already out. Members of the Beta Liberation Front had discovered her omega status, and we hadn’t managed to track them down and silence all of them afterward.