Page 14 of Fight or Fly

Flynn stretched in the nest, scenting the base of Leo’s neck as he did. “She’s waking up,” he said. “She’ll be ready for the next round pretty soon, I’ll wager.”

Leo stretched as well, unconsciously mirroring the alpha behind her. “M’awake,” she murmured, sounding anything but. Her bleary hazel eyes ran around the room, falling on me in my alpha-drugged haze. She smiled, an expression like the sun coming out. As it always did, it made me want to kiss her or collapse into tears, or maybe both at the same time.

“Odama,” she said softly.

I swallowed, my throat clicking.

Jax approached, giving Alex a questioning look that asked her permission before he settled down across from us.

“Hey, Kam. Are you ready to talk to us yet?” he asked.

I licked my lips. “I hate what was done to my body. I don’t think I can enjoy sex. And part of me wants to know for sure, but I’m also afraid to find out.” The words poured out like water from a broken jar.

Jax nodded. “You’ve tried before?”

Leo crawled over to me and climbed onto the couch, squeezing in behind me and laying her head on my hip. “With me,” she said. “But not with alphas.” Her honey and orange blossom scent wrapped around me, further sensitizing my skin.

“We used black market alpha pheromones,” I said.

Flynn made a disgusted noise, joining the rest of us and flopping down next to Jax. “Coulda just asked and had the real thing, Ginger Tea.”

Jax elbowed him, and Flynn responded with a warning growl.

Flynn gestured between himself, Jax, and Leo. “Did any of this do it for you? Get you going earlier?”

“Yes,” I said, “but getting aroused and getting off are two different things.”

It felt surprisingly cathartic to just blurt it all out; throw the ugly, bleeding stump of my omega reproductive system on the ground so the others could stare at it.

Flynn shrugged. “Yeah. Like I told you in Romania, I’ve been with a couple of sterilized omegas. One could still get off and the other couldn’t.” He tapped the side of his head. “I get the impression that a lot of it has to do with what’s going on up here. And no offense, Ginger Tea, but your brain is one big tangle most of the time. This is only the second time I can think of when I’ve seen you let go.”

I flushed, glad my olive complexion would hide the blood rushing to my cheeks. The other time had been when I’d lost my shit and sobbed in Flynn’s arms after Beckett and his pack had rescued us in Romania and whisked us away to safety.

“Uhh,” I said.

“Leo’s gonna start climbing toward her next peak soon,” Flynn said. “And the pheromones will be flying again. Jax’ll take care of her this time. While he’s doing that, I want to see if Alex and me can get you off between us. So, Alex? You up for that? Because you can’t get him pregnant and you can’t accidentally mate him, so your usual excuses won’t cut it.”

It was blunt to the point of cruelty—explicitly defining the things that made me feel broken—but the obvious lack of any intent to hurt allowed Flynn’s words to slide off me without sticking. These were facts. Everyone here knew them. The truth of them existed whether anyone said them aloud or not.

I wasn’t sure how Alex would respond, though. A touch on my chin turned my head until I was looking up at her.

“Is that what you want?” she asked, her green gaze holding mine.

I blinked. Was it what I wanted?

Leo poked me in the hip, and I flinched in surprise. “It’s eating you up not knowing,” she said.

I frowned at her. “Aren’t you supposed to have heat-brain right now?”

She shrugged, unapologetic. “It feels different this time.”

“She’s not coming off blockers,” Jax said. “This is a normal heat, not a crazy rebound heat spent imprisoned in a terrorist cell with an alpha she doesn’t know.”

“What he said,” she agreed. “Now answer the question before my braindoesget stupid again.”

“Y-yes?” I said, sounding like the wishy-washiest omega on the planet.

“Cool,” Flynn said. “Now take your damned clothes off. Why are there still so many fucking clothes on in this room?”

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