Page 2 of Fight or Fly

“Huh,” I said. “Y’know, that’s a good idea. I’m shtill...stillwrapping my brain around him being an omega. Andmated. Shit.”

I’d never had an older omega to help me navigate the minefield of estrus cycles and mate-bonds. My parents were both betas, and while I owed them my life and my freedom after the sacrifices they’d made to protect me from the Committee’s tender mercies, they hadn’t been much help with the nuts and bolts of my body and its responses. They’d tried, but... knowledge about alphomic biology was tightly regulated. You couldn’t just run to the library and check out a book. They’d pretty much all been burned decades ago, back at the beginning of the Purge.

“I’ll do that,” I decided. “But maybe not till I sober up.”

Alex snorted in amusement, her steady parade of downed shots finally starting to outpace alpha alcohol tolerance.

“I’m gonna do this,” I told my empty shot glass. “I mean, since you’re not dead shet...set... against it or anything.”

“Not dead set against it, no,” she said.

I studied her, taking in her straight spine and tight shoulders, even after eight shots, or nine, or whatever it had been. “Do you ever...” I made vague, waving motions with my fingers. “Like, at all anymore?”

She blinked at me without comprehension.

“Sex,” I clarified, confirming that I’d reached thebrain-to-mouth filter failurestage of drunkenness. “Do you ever have sex, since Irina died?”

“Oh.” She poured yet another shot and drank it. “I mean... yeah. Not often, but when the circumstances line up, sure.”

I frowned. “With omegas?” I asked, because she’d seemed, like,reallyagainst that idea after talking about how she’d lost her omega mate and pups.

But she shook her head quickly. “No, with beta men. No uteruses, see? They’re safe, and usually okay with one-night stands.”

My frown didn’t smooth. “Beta men? You enjoy that? Really?”

Alex shrugged a shoulder. “I enjoy the ones who like to take a knot up the ass.”

Comprehension dawned, and I made an exaggerated ‘oh’ shape with my mouth. “Gotcha.” I tapped the side of my nose. “I did that for Kam once, you know. With a...” I trailed off, trying to describe the shape of a dildo in the air. “Thingie. I think he got close—to coming, I mean—but he still couldn’t get there.”

Suddenly, this seemed like the saddest thing in the world. I met Alex’s catlike green eyes, convinced that she would understand. I wasn’t sure why, but I felt we’d connected somehow. It was different than the way I’d connected with Jax and Flynn. Less complicated in some ways. More complicated in others.

“He’s got a huge crush on you,” I confided. “He talked about how he’d like to tease your clit out of its sheath with his tongue and ride it all night long.” I paused, remembering the night we’d spent exploring each other’s bodies. “You should let him. He’s got a really nice tongue.”

Silence reigned for an uncomfortable beat.

Wait, had I really just said that out loud? Based on the perfectly blank expression on Alex’s face, I had. It wasjustpossible I should have stopped after four shots instead of five.

The alpha cleared her throat and gave the vodka bottle a long look—one that said she was thinking about foregoing the shot glass and going straight to the source. But the idea was stuck in my head now, and I couldn’t let it go.

“No, listen though. If I’m doing this heat... thing, and you’re going to be there to keep an eye on the others, you could, maybe... try to help Kam?” It was perfect. Why hadn’t I thought of this before? “He’s safe for you. He doesn’t have a uterus anymore. And you’re both so sad all the time. Maybe you could make each other less sad?”

Alex seemed to be holding her face very still. I couldn’t tell what she was thinking, so I gave up and asked. “Well? What do you think?”

She blinked. “I... think we’re both pretty drunk. Beckett should be back in a few hours with the contraceptives and other supplies. Maybe you should go sleep it off for a bit.”

While I tried to interpret that with a brain that felt like it was slogging through molasses, she rose from the kitchen table and headed deeper into the house, taking the bottle with her. Once she’d disappeared, the ghost of Flynn’s voice echoed in my head.

She didn’t say no.

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