Page 2 of Always Murder

“Pageants aren’t exactly my thing,” I said.

“Don’t be ridiculous.You’re going to be Joseph, and you’re going to love it.”

I opened my mouth and realized I had no idea what to say to that.

“It would mean so much to everyone,” Christine said.And then, to the others, “Dash is very popular.”

“I’m really not,” I said.

“Everyone knows Dash.”

“Oh God, I hope not.”

“EveryonelovesDash.”

“No, definitely not.I’m veryunpopular.It’s a combination of personality and my looks—”

“Dash isalwayssolving murders,” Christine said over me.Then she gave me a littlehurry-upgesture with the knife.“Tell them, Dash.”

Across the table, Millie was giving me a pleading look.

“Actually,” I said, “Keme has saved my life a couple of times.When Vivienne had me at gunpoint, for example—”

“KEME, TELL THEM HOW YOU SAVED US!”

At this, Kassandra and Angeline shared an eyeliner-heavy roll of their eyes.

Keme slouched lower in his seat.He had chosen the no-eye-contact approach to dinner parties.Keme was wise beyond his years.

For the first time that night, Christine flicked a look at Keme.Then her gaze came back to David and Elliott, and there was no mistaking the total and complete dismissal.“Dash was locked in a secret room formonths,” Christine said, “so Vivienne could take advantage of his body, and he kept trying to escape, but Vivienne wouldn’t let him, and he had to go potty in abucket—”

“Abucket?”I couldn’t keep the horror out of my voice.

“That’s the part you object to?”Bobby asked in an undertone.

“David’s a musician,” Kassandra broke in.“He’s on Spotify.”

That seemed to stump everyone for a moment.Bobby rallied, though, and asked, “How did you meet?”

Kassandra managed to look simultaneously insulted and like Bobby was the stupidest person in the world.“On Instagram.”

This was too much, apparently, for Angeline, who cut in, “Elliott and I met inperson.I was having trouble with this stupid ATM, and he swooped in to help me.Elliott’ssosmart.He’s a—”

“I’m a lawyer,” Elliott said.Then he laughed.Flashed a lot of white teeth.“But don’t ask me to get you out of a parking ticket.”

Bobby made a sound that Iknewwas directed at me, but before I could kick his ankle, he asked, “What kind of music?”

“You’ve probably never heard of it,” David said.

Bobby is one of the kindest, friendliest, most easygoing people on the planet (unless his deputy mode activates and he catches you idling at a red curb and you only closed your eyes for five seconds).So, it definitely tells you something when Bobby chooses not to respond.

“Come on, David,” I said—mostly for Millie’s sake.“Tell us.MaybeI’veheard of it; I do spend a ridiculous amount of time on the internet.”

Everyone stared at me.Even Bobby.

“It’s David,” David said, biting off the words.

“Right,” I said.“That’s what I said: David.”

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