“It’s going to be okay.I’ll apologize.And, like you said, Bobby’s super patient.He’s probably got a few ounces of forgiveness left.”
“He does.”
“We’ll work through it.”
“You will.”
It sounded even less convincing when I said it all out loud.
“He forgave you when you hugged him and got all that powdered sugar on him.”
“That was kind of both our faults.”
“And he forgave you when you went for a run and you pretended a bear came charging out of the woods and knocked you down and that’s why you had to sit on that bench.”
“In the first place, a beardidknock me down—”
“And he forgave you that time he came home and you and Keme were trying on all his expensive sneakers.”
“Kemewas trying them on.Keme.I didn’t do anything!I put one on for, like, five seconds to show Keme a dope way to tie the laces, and of course that’s when Bobby walked in—”
“Dash, he loves you so much.And you love him so much.You’ll figure things out.”
“Yes,” I said.“We will.But this isn’t supposed to be a conversation about me.This is a conversation about you and Keme.I believe someone used the phrase ‘messing it up.’”
Some of the light went out of Millie’s face.She gave a limp shrug.
“Not good enough,” I said.But when Millie didn’t say anything, I said, “I’m going to go out on a limb here: Keme doesn’t like how your family treats you, and he’s trying to tell you what to do.”
Millie’s jaw dropped.(It wasnotflattering.) “YES!And no matter how many times I tell him it’s none of his business, he won’t stop!”
“Okay, well, here’s the first part: you’re in a relationship with Keme now, so to some degree, itishis business.When you tell him it’s not, you’re telling him there’s a part of your life that doesn’t include him.Is that what you want?”
“No, that’s the opposite of—”
“Then stop telling him it’s none of his business.You need to tell him what he can and can’t do.He can listen and be supportive when you need to vent.He can’t criticize your mom under the thinly veiled excuse of helping you or protecting you or whatever he claims he’s doing.”
Millie was giving me a slightly goggling look, which was evenlessflattering than the jaw-drop.“How are you so good at this when you’re so bad—”
“Because I’m a writer,” I snapped.“And you can’t keep bossing Keme around like he’s your little brother.He’s a grown man.He’s an adorable little gremlin-wolf hybrid of a grown man who would actually look super cute if you dressed him up in adult clothing and pretended he was, like, a dentist.”
Millie’s look was slightly less impressed now.“I’m not going to tell him you said that.”
“But it’s so good!And I came up with it right on the spot!”
“I know Keme is a grown man,” Millie said.
Her tone was defensive.
And then she blushed.
I mean, my God.If you’re like me, and you’re basically still thirteen years old and the kissy bits still make you squirmy, then you understand why my spirit vacated my body in that exact moment.
Somehow, Millie soldiered on.“I know he’s an adult.But somehow, every time I open my mouth, I start talking to him like—like he’s Ryan or Paul, and I can hear myself, how I sound—” She stopped.And then she groaned.“—like my mom.”
I couldn’t help laughing.Millie, though, didn’t join in.She gave me what Will Gower would have called a gimlet eye.“I’m not laughing at you,” I said.“I’m laughing at the comparison.You don’t sound like your mom, Millie.Well, not exactly.”
“Oh my God,” she moaned.