Page 81 of The Arrangement

"Not on camera." I interrupted her, my voice dark and regretful. Natalie looked thoughtful, propping herself up on her elbow while she watched me.

"You like her." It was a statement, not a question. I was quiet because I hadn't said it out loud, and at this point, I felt if I kept it inside, if no one else knew that, it wasn't real. It would be something I could get past. "Sebastian, quit with the brooding and talk to me."

Leaning back against the back of the couch, I covered my face with my hands, and every moment with Georgia replayed in my mind like a movie, every kiss, every moan: her laugh and her stupid predilection to eat peanut butter and jelly for every lunch like a teenager.

"Yes, I like her," I whispered, still not looking at the phone. "I more than like her, Nat. I've never felt like this, ever."

I lifted my head when I heard the quick rustling of bedclothes to see Natalie sitting up, smeared mascara rubbed underneath her eyes, looking at me like it was the first time she had ever seen me.

"Holy shit, Sebastian Wolfe Quinn, you like her! Maybe even more than like?" Her face erupted in a wide smile as I made a face. "I knew there was something on those videos! I thought maybe it was just because she just really loved the D, but now I think it's because she loved your dick specifically."

Pulling a face, I picked up the phone again. "You watched them?"

She laughed. "I mean, I had to keep tabs on you. You were my first, you know."

"Oh god, Natalie, please," I moaned, my face bursting out into a blush.

"I tossed some dollars your way, I wasn't a cheap ass."

I groaned ever louder, thankful that she had diffused the tension because this was hard enough as it was.

It was silent between us for a moment, Natalie settling back against her pillow, observing me, her blue eyes darting over my unshaven face.

"Seb, have you told her?"Silence answered her as she clucked her tongue. "What did you do after you slept with her?"

"In my defense, I was, I don't know…happy. I thought we were on the same page." She waited for me to continue, her eyes not leaving mine. "Then she got up, saying how it would be better for us to forget about it. And I froze. I just…fuck, Nat, I just left."

She looked thoughtful and sympathetic; even thousands of miles away, Natalie knew how to drag words out of me like no one else.

"And have you reached out to her since?" Her tone was slightly rebuking, and I hung my head. "Sebastian…"

"I knowwwww," I moaned, the chill of the apartment finally getting the best of me as a shiver ran up my spine. "I know."

"So I don't need to tell you what to do now, right?"

Everything in me recoiled at the thought of talking to Georgia, but at the exact same time, there was nothing else I'd rather do. To see her again, hear her voice, and smell her vanilla body spray.

"I don't know what to say." I hated admitting I didn't know how to do something; I had to know how to fix everything. All the time. Of course, that was how I got into this mess.

"Listen, Seb, and I'm only going to say this once. You walk around with everyone's problems weighing so heavily on you I'm honestly surprised you haven't caved yet. It's not healthy. This is your life, too, and your grandfather no longer has anything over you." Natalie flashed her bright smile. "It's time to make choices foryou. Sebby, honey, you know I love you, but faking intimacy for the camera isn't the same as a real relationship. Not like real sex with someone you care about."

Silence overtook me as anything I was going to say left my mind.

"You use your job as a way to cope with how badly you want to be loved, with how much you want to please others. Wolfe's mask isn't the only one you wear, and I have a feeling the role of dutiful grandson and doting brother is even heavier than the balaclava. It's time to live, Seb."

I cleared my throat, just nodding my head because I couldn't find my voice as her words washed over me. Fuck. She was always right, and I hated it.

"Okay, you're going to talk to that cute little brunette and tell her how you feel." I nodded again, not trusting my voice. "And just so you know, I've been able to see your dick this entire time; you're slipping, man. Get your shit together!"

I quickly closed my legs, moving the towel lower on my legs as she barked a laugh and the phone call ended. The rough itch of my newly growing facial hair drew my attention. If I was going to talk to Georgia, I needed a plan. And to shave.

Glancing down to see the time was barely 7:00 p.m., I quickly searched for the number I needed and dialed it quickly before I could change my mind, holding my breath as it rang.

"Hello?"

"Hi, I know you don't know me, and I know it's late, but I have a proposition for you."

Chapter 36

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