Page 122 of The Fate Of Us

I told her about how Nate and I fell for each other, that it was a love built of helping eachother deal with our realities that we couldn’t handle on our own. I told her about Asher and the waves he’s crashed onto us, washing away the flaws and making that love become a whole lot clearer. How it made us realise that there was nothing that could tarnish it, drown it. Destroy it.

I told her about the deal, about taking a year to see the world on our own, learn how tosurvive without each other and prepare us for adulthood where moments like that would arise. I told her about the way he didn’t cry when he left for college, and how I knew something was different about him. Knowing what I know now… I knew I was right.

I told her about what it was like never hearing from him again, as though he’d vanished,as though he’d never really been there. I told how I’d held out hope, that it was just my mind playing tricks on me. That come the day we were going to see each other again… it would be like time hadn’t passed at all.

I told her about that day… when he never came.

That was where she chimed in.

“But… he was there that day. I saw him.”

I just blinked at her, catching my breath.

“Yeah, he came by the old house and told me that he needed to find something.” Her eyesaverted, like the memory was playing out in her head. “He took something with him… Oh God, what the hell did he take—”

The book. That was how he had the last book. He’d come back for the photo of me andAsher, that was what he’d told me. He must’ve taken the book while he was there.

“Yeah, well,” My voice brought her eyes back to me. “That would be the plot twist itseems. He actually did come that day. But… he only told me that the other night.”

“Oh,” was all she said, and I carried on.

I told her about the first time I saw him again at the table read fromDefenders Of Time. Itold her how I felt like I was seeing a ghost, as he walked towards me, as I noticed how the countless years apart had been more than kind to him. I told her that that was how we’d figured out that staying silent was the only way to exist around each other; because there was far too much to say.

I told her all the little moments in between when I thought things could be differentbetween us. I told her about the wrap party last year, and how we almost kissed. I told her about the day after the wrap party when I’d been sent the script toForever and Alwaysby my agent. I told her that I didn’t mind the look of it, considering how much I loved the book. I told her about the day Nate came up to me and asked if I’d accepted the role, how I asked him how he knew about it, how I practically felt the world stop spinning when he confessed he was playing Harry.

“Why did you still agree to do the movie even though you knew you’d have to see him,and pretend to be in love with him.”

A good question, one I thought I knew the answer to when I opened my mouth to reply,when another set of words, ones different from the sentence I had lined up, casually spoke themselves between us.

“Because I didn’t have to pretend to love him.”

I almost laughed as I said that, realising how funny it sounded. Admitting that I perhapsstill loved Nate in my head was one thing, but admitting it out loud, with my sister in the room, it sounded real.

My sister could probably tell from the look on my face that I needed a distraction, so shegrabbed my hand and asked, “Why didn’t you tell me? Any of it?”

I turned my head to face her, ignoring what I’d just said. “I thought… I thought nottelling you would protect you. I didn’t want you to think of him as anything other than the boy who was practically an older brother to you. Despite what he did… he was good to you, and I didn’t want that to change.”

She shrugged. “I suppose he was always good to me… but now that I know what he did,that he went about it the completely wrong way… I hate him a little more than I did last week.” She shook her head. “I just… I can’t believe he did that to you.”

“That’s why I didn’t tell you. I guess I thought keeping the truth from you was better thanyou know the truth.”

“No, I get it. I appreciate it.” she lifted her eyes to me. “But protecting something sotightly is the first way you’re gonna lose it.”

I pulled my brows together. “What do you mean?”

She sighed. “I mean, like… your books for example.” I blinked at her. “You’ve kept themso close to your heart, hidden away from the world for so long that if you don’t let go, it’s the only place they’ll be comfortable. And… keeping what happened between you and Nate to yourself for so long, not talking about the obvious, it’s no wonder that you both crave the silence around one another… right?”

“Yeah…” I breathed.

“So, I guess I’m saying that I don’t want you to protect me from the hard things anymore.Not too long ago you were in my shoes, seeing the world for the first time on your own without two shadows over each shoulder.” She held my stare, our matching fires catching on one another. “If I’m going to survive, you need to let me see the world for what it truly is.”

She was right. She was everything right with the world. Goldie Moore was all thesunshine and happiness and wise thoughts of the world compacted into a tiny body. I had no doubt that she’d survive just fine on her own, where she’s probably always dared to be.

She’d walk the world like it was a three-step journey.

“Okay.” I nodded, tears I hadn’t realised had slipped from my eyes now skating down mycheeks, one landing on our intertwined hands. “I promise, no more protecting.”

“Thank you.” she whispered, silence gracing us for a few seconds before she launched toher feet, shaking herself like she was shaking off the emotions of the conversation and stood tall.

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