Page 49 of Starstruck

it's the only way we make sense

UNKNOWN NUMBER

today at 7:38AM

meet me by thefountain before class. i have something i want to run by you.

goldie?

yeah. how did you know?

you're the only one i've ever seen by that fountain

i don't understand why no one else just wants to exist there. i love it.

but anyway. i need to see you

sure, see you there, sunshine.

wait

how did you get my number?

twitter leak

wtf!?

kidding. it was finn.

I hadn’t slept at all last night.

Couldn’t.

And it had nothing to do with Finn’s constant snores either.

No, every time I closed my eyes, she was all I could see. All I couldhear. The way her golden hair was trapped under the fingers of some lowlife who thought he had any right to touch her. The cry that got caught in her throat as the taller guy crowded her. The way her eyes dulled and became unrecognisable when she stared at them.

The memories wouldn’t leave me alone. They clung to me, replaying in myhead, keeping me sitting up in bed, wide awake. When that happens, when my mind starts spiralling, there’s only one thing that calms my thoughts—I write. But I didn’t write about what happened.

I wrote about her.

When the sun finally broke over the Hudson, I got dressed anddecided to be a good student and get to class early. When I got to campus, I got the message from Goldie, and the first smile I’d cracked since seeing her blow out her candles last night crowded my face.

I don’t think I’ve ever seen a person happier to see a birthday cakein my life. The way she counted the candles with her eyes and sat over their glow, it was endearing. It made me think back to what she'd told me at the freshmen event, and the parts of her story she hadn’t shared that contained the chapters on what made her excuse herself from the table because she was crying over a birthday cake.

A part of my heart broke her for, truthfully, which was why I leftthe table to check on her. And that was probably the best decision I’ve ever made in my life.

Reading over her message again, I tried to remember the few timesI’d passed the fountain on the thousands of times I’d gotten lost in these fucking halls. But somehow I turn down the the right corners to make me stumble across it again.

The water that constantly trickled from the rusting taps, nestled inthe stone details, seemed to put me in a trance, and the sleep that had been nowhere to be seen last night suddenly came over me, and my mind went back to last night in a heartbeat.

My stomach dropped when I remembered how she felt—shaking likea leaf caught in a gust of autumn wind, her cheeks all clammy and red. It felt natural to snake my arm around her back and tug her towards me, getting her as close as possible, as though she’d slip right back out from my hold.

A burst of laughter echoes down the hallway, snapping me out of mydaydream just as I nearly drop my backpack into the fountain. When out of the corner of my eye, I catch a flash of blonde speeding toward me.

I turn, and there she is—eyes sharp with determination, every steppurposeful. I can’t help it; my smile breaks through before I even think to stop it—

“I think we should date.”