Page 87 of Wonderstruck

The fear wrapped around my chestlike a vice. The same fear I’d seen in my Dad after Mom.

I couldn’t do that to her. I couldn’tlet myself become him.

But then, my eyes drifted to herface. Even battered and bruised, she was still Rory—still the girl who made me laugh when I didn’t think I could, who made me feel lighter just by being near her. Who hugged me, held onto me, like she didn't hate me two months ago.

And I knew, in the deepest part ofme, that I loved her. It wasn’t just a crush. It wasn’t just liking her. It was love, the kind that scared me to death because of how much it mattered.

And maybe that was the problem.

Loving her was dangerous. If I ever lost her, it would destroy me.The tears prickling at my eyes again were proof of that.

I stood up abruptly, my chest tightening like I couldn’t breathe. I needed to getout of here, needed to think, needed… something.

Jesse was wrong.

I couldn’t do this. I couldn’t risk it.

I glanced at Rory one last time, herpeaceful face so at odds with the storm inside me. Then I turned and walked out of the room, every step feeling like I was leaving something vital behind.

chapter twenty two

baby steps

don’t freak out, but i’m in the hospital.

The three little dots indicating that someone was typing appeared almost instantly.

First Cora. Then Goldie. Then Daisy.

Cora

WHAT?? you can’t just drop that without the context!

Goldie

I’M ALREADY FREAKING OUT.

Daisy

if this is some kind of joke, i swearto God.

I sighed and quickly typed out a response before they all combusted.

it’s not a joke. i’m fine, i swear. it’s just a scrape.

Cora

you don’t go to the hospital for “just a scrape.”

Goldie

is this because you skate too much? did you fall and break something? we told you to take it easy!

Daisy

i’m texting finn right now. what the hell did he do?

I groaned, pinching the bridge of my nose before typing again.