Page 41 of Surviving in Everton

“Oh god! No. I wouldn’t do that.” I shake my head so fast, I’m afraid it’s going to fly off.

“It’ll be okay, we’ll explain what’s going on. She’ll understand,” he assures me.

“How are we going to explain what’s going on?!? We have noideawhat’s going on, Hudson!”

He pulls me back into his arms and squeezes me tight. Having his strong arms around me like this grounds me. It brings me back to reality. I felt myself start to slip away again. Thank god Hudson’s here to pull me back.

“I’m scared, Hud. What if we can’t find who did this and reverse it? Or worse, what if the damage is already done andcan’tbe reversed? What if these episodes I’m having are only going to get worse and more frequent? I can’t live like this, Hud!” I cry into his chest.

“Shhhh. I know, baby, I know. Let’s just talk to Dr. Johnston and see what he says. We’ll do everything we can to make sure you’re healthy, and the you we all know and love.” I sniffle but nod my head. “Good, now let’s get our girl to school before she’s late.

“Yeah, okay. Thanks Hud. I owe you.”

“You don’t owe me a thing, Sugar. I love you. I would do anything for you.” He grabs my chin and makes sure I’m looking him in the eye before he continues. “Anything. You hear? There’s not a thing in this world I would not do for you. To make sure you’re happy, healthy, and have the life you deserve. I would do absolutelyanything. So would all of the other guys. Don’t you ever forget that,” he demands.

My whole body relaxes as everything Hudson says to me sinks in. I don’t have to worry about what’s happening to me. I know my guys will be there to help me through it. I completely believe him when he says he would doanythingfor me. All of them would, without a second of hesitation.

“I know, Hud.” I lean up and kiss him tenderly then turn and head back inside to collect my daughter. Finding her curled up on the couch in Hud’s office, I walk up to her and squat down beside her. I gently brush the hair out of her face and she looks up at me, her face filled with sadness, fear and love. I don’t know how one little body can handle that much emotion at one time.

“I’m so sorry, baby. I don’t even know what happened,” I explain.

“You were so mad, Mommy. I don’t get it. He just offered to go to the doctor with you like he did last time,” she sniffs, “and you lost it. You yelled at him, then told me to get my stuff, that we were leaving. I’ve never seen you like that. You didn’t even look like yourself.” She looks so scared and confused, it just breaks my heart.

“Oh, baby, come here,” I open my arms for her and she jumps into them. Holding her tight, I rock us back and forth. “I’m so sorry, sweet girl. I didn’t mean to scare you. Shhhhh,” I attempt to calm her as she starts to cry in my arms. “It’ll be okay, baby. I’m sure the doctor can help. Don’t worry.” I sit there on the floor holding her so tight it must hurt, but she doesn’t complain as I tell her over and over how sorry I am and we both cry in each other’s hair.

I don’t know how much time has passed when she finally pulls back and wipes her face. Once she’s done she nods once. “Come on, Mommy, I’m ready to go to school. Thenyougo to the doctor,” she declares, so I wipe my own face and we get up. Hudson must have gone back out front to give us some time alone.

“Hudson’s not mad at you, is he Mommy?”

“No, baby, he’s not mad,” I tell her with a small smile. “Come on, let’s get him and go to school. You’re going to be late for sure now.”

Chapter 18

Rowen

We managed to get Violet to school only five minutes late, so I consider that a win today. We pull up outside the doctor’s office and I just sit there staring at the building. I don’t want to go back in there. I know it’s going to be bad, whatever he has to tell me. I mean with these mood swings and memory loss, itcan’tbe good. Hudson reaches over and grabs my hand, squeezing it reassuringly.

“I’m here for you, Rowe. Whatever he has to say, you’re not alone. We’ll get through this together,” he promises me.

Looking in his intense bright blue eyes, I relax slightly, knowing I have him here to hold me together, in the event that I go catatonic again. I nod and take a deep breath before unbuckling my seatbelt. Hudson meets me in front of his car and guides me to the door with his hand on the small of my back. We walk up to the receptionist’s window and check in, then sit down. It’s not long before a nurse walks us back to the same room we were in last time. Even worse, we only wait in tense silence for five minutes before Dr. Johnston is knocking on the door.

“Good morning, Rowen, Hudson. How are you doing today?” he asks us politely, but what the fuck kind of question is that?

How the fuck are we doing today? Well, gee let me think about it… not fucking good! Hudson must feel my temper rising because he squeezes my hand in comfort. Unfortunately, for Hudson, that was apparently the wrong thing to do. My magic shocks him and he pulls his hand back quickly in pain.

“Ouch! What was that?!?” he exclaims while inspecting his hand.

Dr. Johnston looks at me curiously then takes a look at Hudson’s hand. “I’ve got a salve I can put on that, hold on.” He pats Hudson’s shoulder before leaving the room.

I’m left sitting here staring at my hand like it betrayed me. How did that even happen? I didn’t do that. I didn’t tell my magic to hurt Hudson. I would never do that!

“Hey, it’s okay. It was an accident,” he tries to convince me, but I think we both know I had no control over what happened. That’s what’s so scary about it.

“What’s going on with me, Hudson?” I stare at him with wide pleading eyes. Before he can attempt a response, the doctor comes back with the salve for Hud’s hand.

“Alright, let me have a look at that hand, Hudson.”

He dutifully gives the doctor his hand and I sit there watching Dr. Johnston care for the woundIgave him.

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