"I told you the truth. I didn't have to do that."
"Well, I'm glad you did—for both of us. Because you'll never get what you want from me, and I'll never get what I want from you. Now, we both know."
He places his hand on my cheek and traces my jaw with his knuckles. "Teagan, you can have whatever you want from me. Say the word and it's yours."
His dark eyes look into my own in the way that usually has me throwing all logic out the window. I shrug him off before it works.
"I agree with you. I don't think we should tell Luca about this, either," I tell him before I storm out the door. Unlike his brother, he doesn't chase me; he doesn't grab me and hold me down and beg me to stay.
He doesn't tell me he loves me because he never will. Which is fine—because I don't love him, either, and I don't need him to.
I crawl back into bed with Luca, close my eyes, and pretend I don't recognize that unfamiliar ache in my chest for what it is, but I do.
It's my heart. Breaking.
TWENTY-ONE
"The bus is here; let's go."
They were right. When I woke up this morning, the entire thing with Heidi had pretty much blown over. The magazine printed an apology along with a statement from Heidi that she was under the influence of drugs when she disappeared and will be seeking treatment at a facility in Houston. Luca will play with them tonight, and that's that.
Next stop is Albuquerque. It could be worse—the drive isn't that far, it'll be warmer. Declan will probably go upstairs, and I won't have to look at his fucking lying face or listen to his fucking lying mouth.
But I'm starting to feel the same sentiment as the rest of the family when I first met them—I'm getting tired of the shows and the parties and the clubs. Declan or not, I'm ready to gohome.
"These are for you," Declan says, handing me a shopping bag.
"Why?" I ask dully.
"You said you read the others already."
"I don't want these," I lie. "Not really my thing."
"You're lying—they're all on your wish list. Let's go."
Beside me, Luca laughs. "What did I tell you about hurting his feelings?" he says. "It never ends well. What'd you do to him?"
"I didn't do anything to him. He doesn't have any fucking feelings."
Declan scoffs. "That's cute, Teagan. Keep it up and see what happens."
I glare at him from behind the safety of my sunglasses. "What's that supposed to mean?"
"I have an idea," Luca says and slaps my ass hard on my way out the door.
"Ow! Fuck! That hurt!"
The brothers both laugh, and I punch Luca in the arm before we step into the elevator.
"Oh no, not Teagan's tiny baby fists again! Whatever will I do?" Luca laughs. "You know what? I think I've got a knot right here, baby." He points to his lower back. "You want to help me with that?"
I fold my arms in front of me and lean against the back corner of the elevator.
"Go ahead and laugh at me—that's fine. I already feel like a joke."
"Aw, come on, Teag," Luca says.
"I'm not laughing at you, Teagan," Declan says. "There's nothing funny about how red your little ass is right now; that slap was hard."