Page 25 of Of Angels & Absolution

“Ronique said you’re in Father Salvatore’s class with her,” Manson says. “And since she’s in class right now, I’ve therefore deduced that you’re skipping.”

I don’t answer. I shouldn’t have to tell him that after the other day, I can’t face the priest. Even if Father doesn’t know I was picturing him defiling me in the most sinful ways when I lost control, he still saw me do it. I can’t go to his class again. I can’t go to confession, either. I’ll have to drop his class and never attend mass again.

I’m about to make an excuse and pretend I’m going to lunch so that I don’t have to see Manson either, but just then, I catch sight of Heath walking with a girl, his arm draped over her shoulders while she ducks her head, tucking her hair behind her ear bashfully. I remember his fingers curling around my knee me as he held me open for Angel, his grinning face like a demon’s as he leaned close, describing what he saw. My heart skips a beat, and I match my stride to the goth boy’s, hoping Heath doesn’t notice me since I’m not alone for once.

“I’d never miss Father Hottiepants’s class,” Manson says, jogging up the steps to my dorm and waiting to open the door for me. I scan my card, and he holds it open, beckoning me to enter first. I do, and he follows, holding up a paper bag by way of explanation. “I’m bringing Annabel Lee lunch. She’s on her period.”

“Okay.”

He laughs. “Come on, you can eat with us. I brought plenty.”

“I should check on Dr. Jekyll.”

“Cool,” he says, following me up the stairs, past the second floor. I don’t know how to tell him that I can’t eat lunch with them either. I can’t face anyone. I shouldn’t have ever left my room this morning. Maybe this is what finally gets me to drop out of school and leave campus altogether. Saint probably knew that would do it. That’s why he told Angel to put me on display. He knows my shame is the only thing stronger than my loneliness.

“Holy shit.”

I stop at my door, my stomach going sour, my blood cold. I’m not even surprised to see the message scrolled there. Nothing surprises me anymore. I’m tired, and beaten, and done with all of it.

There is a way that seems right to a man, but its end is the way to death.

I unlock the door without comment, without stopping to gasp and stare. Inside, Dr. Jekyll lifts his head from where he’s sprawled on my bed, looks at us with bored indifference, and lays back down, as if he’s caught my ennui and can’t be bothered, either.

I check his litter box, food, and water. Nothing is out of place.

“You can go,” I tell Manson, not turning his way. “I’ll just hang out here.”

“Um, no?” he says. “First off, we’ve got to call someone about this.”

He gestures at my door, looking at me like I’m insane.

“Why?” I ask. “They’ll just write something new if I wash it off.”

His eyes widen further. “This has happened before?”

I shrug and unwind my handmade scarf. “A few times.”

“Who’s writing it?” he asks. “The other girls?”

I shrug again, turning to hang up my coat.

“Okay, here’s what we’re not going to do,” he says. “We’re not going to accept…That.What we are going to do is go bring Annabel Lee her food before she murders me due to blueberry muffin withdrawals, and then we’re going to figure out who’s behind that and make them stop.”

“It’s fine,” I assure him. “It’s not a big deal. They’ve been doing it all year, and I’ve handled it. I’m not going to drag you into this.”

“Hello, already in.”

“I’ll take care of it.”

He sighs. “Look, I’m all for strong independent bitches, obviously.” He shakes the bag at me. “But everybody needs somebody. Now come eat lunch in a room that’s not runningwith… Let’s call it paint. Otherwise, I’m texting Annabel Lee to come eat with us, and she’s going to be grumpy about leaving her bed. Until she sees the blood, and then she’ll probably insist on doing a séance or something. So. What’s it going to be?”

“Fine,” I say. “But don’t say anything about this to her.”

I stomp out of the room, and Manson follows. I don’t understand why he wants to lure me away from my room so badly, unless he’s somehow involved. Maybe Annabel Lee is the one leaving the messages. Apparently she’s been here all morning, and she could have lied about forming her own opinion of people regardless of her family. I should know better than anyone how loyal that family is to each other.

Maybe she wants revenge for her cousin.

Maybe she wants me to stay away from him.

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