Page 75 of Sweet Ruin

“I stupidly thought that maybe I could do both,” he said. “That I could be with you in secret and still try to take William down. But it was never fair of me to ask that of you. And even though you rejected me, even though you were moving on, William still suspected my feelings for you.”

I wrapped my arms around my body as the chill in the air began to seep beneath my skin. The sun had gone behind a cloud and taken its warm glow with it. Even the slight breeze that had swirled around the park when we arrived had halted as Noah spoke. It was as if the world around us was holding its breath and listening to what he had to say.

“I knew I just needed to make it to my eighteenth birthday,” Noah said. “When my trust finally opened and I got my shares in Hastings Laboratories. Then I could instigate the sale of the company to Matthew. Once it was all agreed, I wouldn’t need to pretend anymore. But I couldn’t let my grandfather suspect I wasn’t committed to our family, that I wasn’t still on his side—not when I was so close.

“It didn’t help that he was so fixated on you. He seemed so angry at the idea that another LaFleur had entered our lives. He genuinely believed my dad was having an affair with your aunt. He blamed her for his death, and he was projecting that onto you."

A shudder ran through me, not from the cold but from the reminder of William’s pure hatred for me as a LaFleur. One that he thought was going to corrupt and endanger his grandson.

“I had to do everything I could to protect you,” Noah continued. “But I knew ignoring you wasn’t enough. So, I told my friends to stop talking to you and convinced Veronica to fake a relationship with me. I know how our school works and that word would get back to my grandfather. It was the only way I could ensure that this all went down the way we planned and you stayed safe.”

It was much harder than I expected to hear Noah’s explanation, and I stood from the bench and paced away from him. “Why didn’t you just tell me? Why did you let me think the worst of you? Why did you let me move on?” My voice broke over my last question, and my heart clenched in pain. “I would have kept my distance. I could have pretended…”

“I couldn’t ask you to do that,” he said, standing to meet me. “There were no guarantees in any of this. And if this plan didn’t succeed, I would have moved to Plan B and then Plan C. I couldn’t ask you to wait for me, not when I had no idea if or when this would work.”

"You should have given me the choice. I could have handled this.”

“You weren’t the problem. I was. No matter how well I acted, it seemed I could never completely convince William I didn’t have feelings for you. That you weren’t a threat to him. Even when I acted like I was with someone else, he suspected. But he was right. I never stopped caring for you. Not for one day. Not for one minute.”

I swallowed and finally looked him in the eyes. “Noah…”

“I know,” he murmured. “I know you’re with someone else now. I know it’s not fair that I say these things to you.”

“It’s not even close to fair.”

“Like I said, I know. But it doesn’t stop me feeling this way. I love you, Isobel, and I would do anything for you.”

His words slammed into me with the power of a tidal wave. They rolled over me and pushed down on me, leaving me disorientated and struggling for breath. I rubbed a stray tear from my cheek as I looked out at the frozen pond. My heart couldn’t take this. It was all too much. Noah’s confession was going to break me all over again.

As the surge of emotion washed over me, I somehow managed to stand my ground, take a breath and respond.

“It’s too late,” I said. “I understand why you did what you did, but it doesn’t change anything. I’ve moved on, and you should too.”

He looked like he wanted to argue, but I cut him off before he got a chance. “I want you to take me back to school,” I said, looking out at the lake once more. “And then I want you to forget about me. Forget about us.”

“I’ll take you back to school if that’s what you want.”

“Thank you.” I released a breath, relieved he wasn’t going to argue with me. I went to walk back to the car, but Noah continued before I could take a step.

“But forget about you?” he said. “That’s impossible.”

CHAPTERTWENTY-ONE

Noah and I barely spoke for the rest of the journey home. He’d just confessed his love for me, but I’d told him I was with someone else and to forget me and move on. There wasn’t much more we could say to each other after that. But even though we sat in silence, my mind was a hive of activity as I desperately tried to work through everything I’d learned over the last few hours and decide how I felt about it all.

I only broke the silence when we arrived back at school. I quickly thanked Noah for the ride before I jumped from his car and hurried back to the dorms. I didn’t want to seem ungrateful or rude, but I needed space from him. Noah had opened his heart to me at his dad’s memorial. He’d said some beautiful things, and he seemed genuinely sorry for the way I’d been caught up in his quest to destroy his grandfather. I even understood why he’d done everything he did, but that didn’t change the fact he’d broken my heart. He couldn’t just turn around and expect me to fall at his feet the moment he decided it was the right time for him.

I was still feeling flustered and overwhelmed by it all when I got back to my room. I needed to talk to someone, so I dumped my bag and went in search of Anna. Thankfully, she was in her room and her roommate was out.

“Hey, you’re ba—” Anna answered the door with a smile, but she cut herself off when she saw the expression on my face. “Are you okay? I heard about last night.”

“You heard already?” I asked as I walked past her and into the room.

“Cress called to let me know,” she explained. “She thought you’d need someone to talk to when you got back to school.”

“Well, she was right,” I said as I started pacing the room. “I still can’t wrap my mind around it.”

“It sounds like it was pretty hectic,” Anna said. “So, Noah really sold his grandfather’s company to your dad?”

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