Page 57 of Catch Me If You Can

“What?”

“Ask me if I love her.”

My chest tightens. “Caleb… you obviously do—”

“I don’t,” he blurts out. “I mean… I thought I did. I love her, yeah, but not like that. Not like—” He catches him self, keeping back from saying something. Something too good to be true. “Nathaniel…” He exhales like it physically hurts. “I don’t love her.”

I drag a hand through my hair, my heart pounding in my ears.

“Then why the hell did you come here to propose?”

“Because I panicked,” he admits. “My dad’s been pressuring me about growing up—settling down, taking over the business. Sarah’s been echoing the same thing. I just…acted. I wasn’t thinking. It was impulsive and dumb and—God.”

He drops down on the edge of the bed, head in his hands.

I stare at him. Apanic proposal? That’s a new one. Even for Caleb. And yet… am I any better?

I spent four years orbiting around Sarah, fantasizing about a life that never existed. And now, one weekend with Caleb and everything feels flipped upside down.

Slowly, I walk over and sit beside him.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you,” he says quietly.

I nod. “Why didn’t you?”

He looks at me thenand damn, even with tears glistening in his eyes, he’s still beautiful. “I didn’t want you to run. I don’t even know what this is between us. But the thought of going back to not having you in my life… it hurts. This weekend—it’s meant everything to me. I was scared that if I told you about the ring, I was going to lose you again.”

I swallow the lump rising in my throat. Okay, so we’re feeling similarly. That’s good, I guess. But, still—

“Fuck, Caleb. A ring?” I laugh, breathless, shaking my head. “Yeah, I guess Iwould’vefreaked out. Probably wouldn’t have done all of…this.” I motion behind us on the bed.

He chuckles softly. “Are you still freaking out now?”

“A little,” I admit. “But I get it. I do. We were both chasing her. You just came more prepared.” A smile tugs at my lips.

A subtle twitch of amusement plays at the edge of his mouth, a little sad, and stares down at his hands again. “Do you still want to go?”

My smile falters. He looks at me, eyes scanning mine like the answer might be buried somewhere behind them.

But he wont find any answers because honestly, I don’t know the answer to that either. Not really.

I’ve spent four years idealizing Sarah, building her up into someone perfect. My end-game.

Then this weekend happened.

Caleb happened.

I’m not ready to name it, not yet, but the thought of going back to life without him stings more than I want to admit. I just got him back and I’m supposed to what? Forget this all happened?Never.

But, what if this isn’t as real to him as it is to me? I mean…it’sCaleb Brown.The flirtatious, womanizing, life of the party who’s scared of settling down unless it’s apparently with Sarah Lockwood. Am I supposed to believe that he’s just going to do a one-eighty and choose…me? I trust him…but do I trust…inthis?I’m not sure.

“I think we should go see her,” I say, almost a whisper. “For…clarity…or answers, or whatever.”

Something shifts in his expression—disappointment? Resignation? But he nods and manages a small smile.

“Yeah... let’s go see my girl,” he says with a wink.

I roll my eyes. “Shut up,” I mutter, nudging him.

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