Page 46 of Home Between Homes

I rocked back and forth in my seat. “I... Jack, I... Can we please talk? In person?” He didn’t answer within three seconds, so I continued. “I thought you were right that it would be better if we didn’t spend another night together because that would only make it harder for us to say goodbye today, just like I thought I was okay with leaving. I’m not. I don’t want to leave. I don’t want to be‘just friends’with you, and I don’t want to say goodbye at all.”

“But what about your job at the FDA, and?—”

“I don’t care about that. I care about you. It’s ridiculous and stupid, I know, but damn it… I freakinglikeyou. Like I never liked anyone before. So much so that I decided to worry about the other things later.Youare what I want. You make me feel good. You make me laugh and feel joy. I would rather spend my life making you feel the same way than do the adult thing and work a stupid job I don’t care about. I want to spend more days with you. And nights. All of them. I want to cook your favorite meals and wash your hair. When you’re sad, I want to cry with you, and when you’re happy, I want to laugh with you. I want to adopt a dog, a cat, and a damn alpaca with you. I wantto bewith you. The rest doesn’t matter. It will fall into place somehow.”

His cries now filled the line. It took him a minute, but I waited as patiently as he did. “I don’t want to say goodbye either, Noah,” he sobbed.

“Then, can we please meet? To see if there’s a way out that doesn’t mean we’ll never see each other again?”

“I’m still at work?—”

“Doesn’t matter. I’ll wait until you’re done. How long? Five, six, ten hours?”

It took him another five seconds. “Do you want to come to my place in an hour?”

There was only one answer I could give.

THIRTEEN

HOME

The address Jackhad given me was in—if you could call it that—downtown Seastone. His apartment was in the only three-story building on the boulevard, next to ten empty and abandoned storefronts. The trees lining the snow-covered sidewalks had lost all their leaves, and it wasn’t clear if that was because it was winter or if they were dying because no one was taking care of them. His apartment building stood out because, unlike the others, its facade looked like it had recently received a fresh coat of gray paint.

I arrived ten minutes after our call and spent the waiting time on my phone searching for apartments in Seastone. Funny enough, only two apartments came up that were in the exact same building where Jack lived. It was probably a little premature to be looking at all, but I took it for what it was: a manifestation of my desire to stay with Jack. After ten minutes, the fatigue of a sleepless night caught up with me. Instead of taking a nap, I got out of the car. The cold greeted me like an old friend, but I decided to walk the streets anyway. I couldn’t risk falling asleep now and arriving late. Not if I wanted Jack to give me,us, a chance.

I strolled through the neighboring streets. I found more closed shops and empty buildings that told stories of a glorious time long gone when the city was full of life, as well as a small town hall that looked newly renovated, but its windows weren’t lit either. The streets were empty except for a man in his late fifties driving a plow truck, who eyed me as if he thought I had suspicious things in mind.

I checked my phone, and with only twenty minutes left, I headed back. As I walked around the corner, a familiar red Ford Escape was now parked in front of his building, letting me know Jack was already back. I rushed up to the glass front door, found an intercom doorbell on the left, and pushed the button on top as Jack had told me. Ten seconds later, a buzzing sound alerted the entire street to my visit. I pulled open the door and sprinted upstairs. Only one white light bulb per floor lit the windowless stairwell. It was so quiet and cold in here that it was obvious the other apartments weren’t rented. I sprinted all the way to the third floor, where I found a massive door slightly ajar, Jack standing inside, still wearing his yellow jacket.

“Hey,” he said, but my arms wrapping around his back drowned out his words. I pressed my chest so close to his that he had to take a step back to keep from falling over. I buried my face deep into his collarbone, breathing him in. His warmth, his touch, and the scent of pine smelled like home.

Jack leaned his chin against my head, brushed his nose into my hair, and took a deep breath. His arms trembled. “I’m sorry, Noah,” Jack sniffled, holding me close as if he was afraid to let me go. “I shouldn’t have bailed on you yesterday.”

“It doesn’t matter anymore,” I replied, his jacket muffling my words.

“No, it does. Not meeting you was the stupidest decision of my life. When I came home yesterday, everything felt so empty. The apartment seemed even smaller than I remembered, andthe ceiling looked like it was going to cave in on me. I wanted to forget everything and push the memories of you away because I couldn’t handle the thought that this was it. But when I saw your name on my phone earlier, I couldn’t lie to myself anymore. I wanted to hear your voice. And then you said all those things, and I realized all I did was take away the last chance we had to be together. Please forgive me.”

I pulled my head back but not my hands. “If you had spent the night, I might not have reached the right conclusions. So... I guess I should actually thank you.”

“You’re...welcome?” He wrinkled his nose and made a puzzled face. “Sorry.Who’sapologizing towhomnow? I’m confused and exhausted. I couldn’t close my eyes last night.”

I chuckled. It was probably inappropriate, but the fact that we both couldn’t sleep somehow relaxed me. “Well, we’re here now. And I don’t want to be anywhere else.”

“You can’t imagine how happy it makes me to hear that. Come on, let’s go inside.” He pushed the door open a little more and led me into his apartment.

The room behind it was cramped. On the right, there was a single bed, a desk with an old computer next to it, and a TV mounted above it. Otherwise, the walls were bare, and the ceiling was low. Two doors in the left corner led to what I assumed were an equally tiny kitchen and bathroom.

“Welcome to my humble abode,” he said.

“Thank you for having me. It’s cozy.”

“It’s mostly cheap and located close to everything important.”

He took off his coat and hung it over the desk chair. “You can put yours on the hook if you like,” he said, pointing behind me.

I closed the door and found a single coat hook, which now became the home of my jacket. When I turned around, Jack was leaning against the door next to the desk. We looked at eachother, and it took me a second to realize that I was really here with him.After twenty-four agonizing hours, we were finally together again. I rushed over and pulled him into another hug. It was probably the trillionth time we had held each other, but it still felt better than before.

“I missed you so much. I know it was only one night, but it felt like a thousand,” Jack said, loosening his grip. His hands went to my cheeks. He grabbed them and paused for a moment, taking me in. His eyes were red. His head swayed slightly from side to side. “You’re really here.” He gave me a little kiss before pulling away and looking at me. “This isn’t a dream, is it?”

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