Page 13 of Morning Walks & Midnight Talks

Matt opened his eyes again, and an honest smile appeared. "We just did that," he said.

“True,” I agreed.

He propped himself up on his left arm just enough to get a better look at me. He pursed his lips and pressed them against mine one last time.

I expected him to jump up straight away or at least avert his gaze and joke about what had happened between us, but he didn't.

He just lay there and smiled at me.

And so did I.

4

MIDNIGHT TALKS & MORNING WALKS

Icaught sight of Matt in the mirror. His shoulders hunched forward slightly as he fastened his jeans. His hair rebelled in every direction while his cheeks glowed, unable to hide the rush still running through him. I took an extra second to pull my lucky shirt over my head, listening to the soft rustle of Matt moving behind me. The faint trace of Matt’s cologne was still on me, and I could only hope that once I went to bed later, it would still linger in the room so I could enjoy it at least a little longer.

I sat on the edge of the bed and tugged on my socks while fighting an imaginary weight on my neck that tried to force me down. This was the moment shortly before we’d mumble our goodbyes, where Matt would flash that easy grin, slip out the door, and that would be that. That’s how these things always went. There was no reason it should be different with a guy whose only experience with another man was me. It was just something he was curious about, a one-time experiment, a night that would stay tucked away in the shadows of memory. And that was okay. We had both enjoyed it and shared something real in the moment, even if it wouldn't mean more. I could live with that. I just had to.

Matt cleared his throat behind me, prompting me to look at him in the mirror again. He shifted his weight and leaned down to grab his shirt. “Do you wanna crack open those beers I brought?” His voice was soft and almost casual, but his eyes glanced toward the door and back at me as if he wasn't sure if his suggestion was a good idea.

“We can do that, yeah,” I replied, tilting my head. “But it’s also okay if you're tired.”

Matt tugged his shirt over his head, but his arms got tangled in the sleeves halfway through. He huffed out a sheepish laugh as he fumbled with it. “I’m very much awake.”

“You’re a night owl, aren't you?”

His shirt finally came down, and he smoothed the fabric flat with his hands. “Yeah. Although the prospect of Sora not peeing on the floor makes getting up in the morning easier.”

I chuckled. “Pounce luckily never did that, but he’s also insistent that we leave at a specific time. If I ever left him alone for days, I guess he’d probably find a way to let himself out of the house and take himself for a walk.”

“But that’s certainly nothing he has to worry about.” Matt’s smile could’ve melted my heart if I hadn’t tried to keep myself from reading too much into it.

Before we got lost in an awkward, unwanted conversation about whether this was just a one-time thing, I pushed myself up and strolled toward the door. “Come on,” I said, winking at him. “Let’s grab those beers.”

We padded out into the living room.

Sora and Pounce were sprawled out on the rug, too tired to be interested in us at all.

The two bottles still waited for us on the countertop of my kitchen island, their dark glass covered in tiny drops of condensation.

“I should’ve put them in the fridge,” I noted.

“They’ll still be good,” Matt reassured me as he shuffled toward the shelves in the living room. His gaze wandered over my books, plants, and action figures. His head twitched forward once it landed on my small collection of old video games. “Nofreakingway. You have an original copy ofAlley Fighter Two?”

I fished a bottle opener out of the second drawer on the left. “I found it at a yard sale years ago.”

Matt's face lit up as if he had just found a secret level. “Dude, wehaveto play. Please.”

I trotted back to the bottles and opened both of them. “If you want to lose that badly, sure, let’s go for it,” I teased.

“Oh, I may have lost my anal virginity to you, but I won’t lose a game I’ve played for hundreds of hours.”

I stopped mid-motion of grabbing the beers. This wasn’t the script I had expected for the night. Nothing happened as I thought it would. Neither our banter during the trivia night, nor the sex, nor that he didn’t want to leave straight away. As I stood there, watching Matt take the cartridge off the shelf and inspect it as if it were a treasure, something loosened in my chest. Everything was happening exactly as it should. And there was nothing to worry about. It didn’t matter if this was the only time or if this was simply the beginning. Either way, it would become a cherished memory.

I grabbed the beers and went over to him. “Does it even count as losing your anal virginity if it was just a finger?”

“It was the first thing that ever went in there, so...yeah.”

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