Page 81 of Paging Dr. Summers

My grip on the paper tightened, hating that she was hurting because of me.

That’s not on you. It’s all on me. I changed the rules when I knew better.

It wasn’t on her. We’d both known there was something more between us from the very beginning.

Although, I suppose you deserve some of the blame. Dang you for being the kind of man who gives me his last fry without me asking and jumps into a frigid lake in the middle of the night to save my naked self from hypothermia. If that wasn’t noble enough, you told off Maxwell and made sure I didn’t get hepatitis when I got my tattoo.

But it wasn’t all the heroic things that made me fall for you. What really sealed the deal was the way you would whisper my name before you kissed me, like in that moment I was the only person who existed to you. It was in the way you never dismissed my silly questions but answered them with genuine thought, even though they were ridiculous. And you deserve huge props for always keeping your radio tuned to a classic rock station when we drove together. Thank you for letting me ramble endlessly about all the music and band trivia in my head, even though I’m sure you thought I was crazy sometimes. Those songs and stories are like old friends to me, and you welcomed them into your world simply because they were important to me.

Don’t even get me started on how adorable you were with Sophie. Watching you with her, I knew you’d make an amazing dad. I really hope you get the chance one day to have children of your own. Those kids will be the luckiest in the world—and so will the woman who gets to share that joy with you.

Her words pricked my heart, making my eyes sting. I knew she meant every word because that’s the type of woman she was.

I mean this with all my heart: I want you to find a woman who makes you as happy as you deserve to be. Someone whose light isbright enough to withstand Erica’s shadow. I wish I were that woman, but we both know I’m not. I don’t belong with you or in Aspen Lake.

She was wrong. We did belong together. I felt that now more than ever. Her absence was a wake-up call. The thought that I would never see her again was unfathomable. And I was going to prove it to her. I was going to fix this. I had to.

Thank you for an amazing summer and for being the best fling I’ve ever had. I mean, you’re my only fling, but don’t let that take anything away from you.

I chuckled, even though I felt as if her words had punched me in the gut.

Did my best not to fall for you,

Brooke

(Okay, maybe I didn’t do my best, but I’m pinning that on you.)

PS: I swiped the strawberry charm bracelet you made. That’s why I left you mine.

I let the letter fall to the ground. Eden was right. I was an idiot.

“How long ago did she leave?” I refused to let this be the end.

“Um, I don’t know. Maybe thirty minutes ago.”

I pulled my phone out of my pocket and dialed her. It rang and rang and rang. “Damn it, Brooke, pick up,” I pleaded. When she didn’t answer, I knew what I had to do. “Eden, keep calling her. If she answers, please beg her to stop. Tell her I’m coming for her.”

“It’s about time.” Eden sounded both exasperated and proud of me. “Go chase that girl.”

I regretted that I hadn’t done it sooner. Now, I hoped it wasn’t too late.

THE RAH-RAH,I’M GOING my own wayattitude I’d had when I blew out of Aspen Lake lasted until about Reno, when the gravity of what I’d done hit me, and I realized how much I wanted to see Logan one more time. Even though I knew it would only lead to me never wanting to leave him again.

I kept telling myself it was better to rip the Band-Aid clean off—except there was nothing clean about this. This one had torn the skin—or, you know, my heart. The tears came down in floods, making it hard to see, so I pulled off into a gas station and blared my favorite breakup song, “Un-Break My Heart” by Toni Braxton.

I leaned my head on my steering wheel, absorbing every word and note as tears dripped onto my bare legs. Minute after minute after minute, I stayed in that position, playing the song on an endless loop, wishing someone could un-break my heart. Preferably before I got a huge crick in my neck and had to spend the night in Reno. How pathetic would it be if I only got forty-five minutes away?

Judging by how I seemed unable to move, and the tears weren’t going anywhere, I was going to find out just how pathetic it was. Two different women had already knocked on my window to make sure I was okay. I’d blubbered through the glass that I’d just left the perfect man for me, because he was still hopelessly devoted to his dead wife. They’d nodded like they understood and had gone on their merry ways.

On what had to be my twentieth listen of “Un-Break My Heart,” I heard some tires squeal loudly behind me like someone had braked suddenly, and then a door slammed. Someone had probably called the police to report a crazy woman in the parking lot. One look at me, and they were going to call for a psych evaluation.

Honestly, I probably needed one. I could tell them all about how my rich and powerful father had paid off my mom because he didn’t want me, but then my mom had hatched a crazy plan thirty years in the making to force our meeting. But Maxwell Harrington couldn’t have that. No way was he going to let his middle-class daughter wreck his world, so he’d tried to get me as far away as possible from him, in Florida or anywhere that wasn’t Aspen Lake, under the guise of “helping” me.

I’d be sure to mention that while that plot unfolded, I had been falling in love with my neighbor, who was still madly in love with his dead wife. Then, when I’d discovered who my evil father was and his nefarious plan, not only had he rejected me, but the handsome doctor I was smitten with had left me for his dead wife.

I could picture the psychiatrist whispering to their nurse that this was outlandish, and I had probably just watched too many CW dramas. At that point, the nurse would probably tranquilize me, and I would welcome it because, unfortunately, it was all real, and I wouldn’t mind forgetting about it for a hot minute.

So, when the knock on my window came, I didn’t even flinch. I lifted my head, expecting to see a police officer and ready to accept my fate of being hauled off and examined, even sedated.Bring it on,I thought.