Page 180 of King Luna

Stroking from root to tip, Noah plays with my hair slower and slower, washing pleasure down my spine until my heart rate is soothed and Ari’s wiggling slows. As my body loosens beneath Noah’s featherlight touches over my eyelids and lips, I finally drift off to sleep.

But when I wake up sore and with a bladder ready to burst, I’m too exhausted to move. Tears flood my eyes the second I open them.

Noah, all instinct, dashes into our bedroom to find me upset, only to have his expression drop into fear alongside me.

I laugh as I swipe at my eyes. “I don’t know why I’m so extra emotional.”

Noah usually smiles along with me. Today, he drifts silently to the edge of our bed, taking my hand in his. “Do you need anything, gorgeous? Other than a bathroom trip.”

I want to keep laughing at myself, but it comes out as an embarrassing whimper. “Sorry.”

Stooping over me, Noah plants a slow, soft kiss on my forehead. My heart bursts with affection as more tears slip down my cheeks without my permission. Thankfully, Noah doesn’t take it too seriously, his voice gentle and soothing as he delicately cleans away my tears. “Do you still feel up for therapy, my sweet Omega? I can call Jenny and cancel it for you.”

“No, I feel like I really need it. I think it’ll help.”

“Okay, good. I’m going to take you soon, after we get you some water and food.”

I sigh. “Okay, thank you. And I’m—”

“Nope. No more sorries.”

I chuckle, expecting Noah to smile alongside me. But as I gaze into my mate’s eyes, his protective wolf stands proud in our bond.

“I told you, Aliya; you’re doing a favor so huge that I could never return something as beautiful and meaningful back to you in my lifetime. Don’t apologize for anything you need to keep you and this baby safe. That includes after you’ve given birth for us and you’ll need as much recovery time as you can get. Not a single second more of this guilt, okay?”

I don’t think I’ve met anyone so sweet. Fresh tears cloud my eyes, but this time, my fear has melted away. Letting out a slow, shaky breath, I nod through a smile. “Okay. I love you.”

My mate’s eyebrows finally soften. “I love you too.”

As Noah drives me to therapy, our hands remain laced over our stirring baby. Ari is as vibrant as ever, pushing against my sore ribs.

My sweet mate has been dragging our birth necessities bag with us everywhere, just in case, but today, the sight of it in the back seat blasts nerves through my chest. Noah counts my deep breaths with me, pointing out the beauty in towering treelines, hawks perched on the mountainside, and fresh signs of winter’s chill around us. By the time he’s helping me hoist myself up the two front steps leading into Jenny’s office building, the part of me that’s determined and ready to give birth to Noah’s baby has taken charge once more.

But Noah stops me in the hallway, just outside the elevators. The second I turn over my shoulder to look him in the eyes, my heart flinches.

Redness swells Noah’s features, his tears ready to spill.

My hand tightens around his. “Oh, Goddess, Noah. What’s wrong?”

He chokes out a sharp, breathy laugh, covering his face from me with an elbow hooked around his eyes. Turning away, Noah forces me to waddle after him a few steps before he whips back around with a wet laugh, grasping both my hands to keep me from walking any further. “S-sorry, I don’t know. I’m just extra emotional too. I’ve never seen someone so strong in my life.”

As Noah’s eyes sweep across my face, I’m unable to grasp how someone so beautiful could cry over me with his whole heart. Our eyes lock, and a tremendous love bursts inside my chest, giving me all the power I need to do this.

Gripping Noah by the collar, I kiss him in the hallway the best I can, struggling to reach his lips over our pup. But Noah meets me halfway, cuddling up to me as close as he can as he stoops over me to ease my stretch. It’s a small gesture, but shines as clear as ever as I release his lips.

“You have no idea how much you’re doing for me,” I whisper against his lips, my racing heartbeat waking our baby until they wiggle against the pressure of Noah’s body against mine. Our eyes chase each other as we huddle as tight as we can, our baby nudging Noah’s belly just as heartily as my own. Noah’s hands scoop beneath my womb, lifting it ever-so-slightly to ease pressure off my pelvis until I let out a heaving sigh. “I might seem like an emotional wreck, but it’s only because I love your baby so much. Not only would I have lost my sanity ages ago without you, but if I didn’t have you nourishing every piece of me, I don’t think I’d have anywhere near the amount of courage or confidence I've found to run our pack family too.Youare the strongest wolfI’veever met, Noah, and I’m not just talking about physical strength. You bring the best out of everyone you love.”

Noah bites his lip. Silence stretches between us as we separate, Noah’s palms slowly easing my belly back to its low drop.

Goddess, maybe Noah has a point and Ari really has dropped into position: I’ve never felt this much constant pressure in my pelvis, and so low in my hips. I bite my lip, staving off the pain.

Noah doesn’t seem to notice; he helps me into the elevator with his chin tucked to his chest, silent but absolutely touched. I giggle, cuddling against his arm.

In therapy, Jenny and I work on some of my most difficult harm fears about motherhood using Exposure and Response Prevention. At least, I expected them to be difficult.

I almost can’t believe how easy it feels. Whether it’s the strength of Noah’s heart rooted firmly in my chest, or the many loving conversations I’ve had with our pack leading up to my giving birth any day now, it’s clear how much my favorite wolves have healed my soul; I feel like I can achieve anything.

What if I can actually be a good mom?

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