Page 181 of King Luna

Joy creeps up so high in my chest that it spills from me in laughter.

Jenny’s eyes widen as much as her smile. “What? What’s so funny?”

Picturing how odd I must look only makes me laugh more—at least, until I suck in a tight gasp. “Oh, no! I can’t pee on your couch!”

Springing into action, Jenny and I have the same problem Noah and I had last night: I genuinely can’t get up from her couch, leaving us laughing so hard that I have to clamp my hand over my crotch to keep from peeing on the soft cushions. Eventually, we manage to free me from the couch’s grasp, and I waddle off to the bathroom.

Reentering Jenny’s room, I find her still quietly chuckling to herself. “There you are! Feel better?”

I laugh. “Barely. I’ll probably have to pee again in five minutes.”

As I ease myself back onto the couch with an aggrieved old man’s grunt, Jenny and I erupt into giggles again.

Jenny curls into her chair. “It’s nice to see you enjoying yourself. I know the past month has been so tough.”

I sigh through the last of my laughter, adjusting a pillow behind me to take a bit of pressure off my back. “It has been. But I’ve always felt like it’s nicer to try to laugh through the tough times anyway.”

“Isn’t that the truth. What was so funny in the first place?”

I smile. “I guess it wasn’t funny exactly, more like exciting. I’ve been so stressed that I’d never feel better, or that my OCD’s anxieties would poison our baby somehow. But sitting here with you today, exhausted as hell, this was probably the simplest ERP session in my life.”

The reflected joy in Jenny’s eyes confirms it; she sees the strength in me too. My wolf puffs her chest out, even as her belly droops low.

I think I can actually do this.I’m ready for you, Ari.

Just as my confidence soars, Jenny’s smile falters. “I have to say, your baby has droppedreallylow, and you’ve seemed more out of breath than ever today. Are you sure you’re feeling okay?”

My heart flips. I blink a few times, startled by the sharp contrast in my emotions as a biting fear reenters my mind. “Yes, just the usual pain and exhaustion. Why is everyone seeming so concerned?”

Jenny sort of smiles along with me, but sort of not—just like Noah did to me this morning. “I’m not sure, I’m just sensing something a little fearful beneath the surface.”

Just as soon as I’ve reached the peak of my confidence, I’m hit with a flood of anxiety.

I want to believe this feeling is temporary. That Jenny just pointed out old, tired fears in my head.

But the second I feel this rooted fear, it’s clear this is an anxiety that has been creeping up on me. What if, now that I’ve reached such a critical point in my lifetime, all the joy we’ve worked tirelessly to cultivate could be stripped away from me in a heartbeat—just like it was in the past, time and time again? I swallow these thoughts down as hard as I can, stroking our baby as they wiggle back into action.

I want to explain this all to Jenny—my wild, fluctuating swings of emotions, and all the heavy, heartfelt feelings beneath them as Noah and I have been preparing to expand our family. But just as I suck in a breath to speak, I’m met with a whipping, air-stealing kick to the ribs.

Crying out, I can hardly breathe through the pain; a tiny foot wedges itself against my rib cage, bringing stinging tears to my eyes. “Ow, ow, ow!”

Jenny rushes over, at my side in a heartbeat. “Oh, God, are you having another practice contraction?”

I groan, stretching as far as I can in an attempt to ease pressure away from this tiny, havoc-wreaking foot. “No, nothing like I was the whole weekend. I just have a very stubborn foot in my ribs!”

Jenny laughs as I sputter through a whimper-laugh. “Oh, you poor thing. Breathe through it.”

Grasping my hand, Jenny breathes alongside me, each passing second extending as our stubborn little pup is determined to carve out more room inside me. I can’t help it; I squeeze poor Jenny’s hand tight and mindlink our pup.

Please, my love, move that little foot.They wiggle, forcing my breath to hitch.Come on, sweet baby, you can do it. Please, move for me.

Whether it’s luck on my side, Ari tiring themself out, or the chance that they could somehow understand my pleas through our budding bond, they unlock their little knee, curling up with a drag of their back across my belly button. I release a sputtering exhale, panting hard. “Oh, thank God.”

Jenny sighs with me. “Goodness, Aliya. I am just so proud of you.”

I’m suddenly aware I’m still death-gripping her hand, releasing it with a gasp. “Oh, Jenny, I’m so sorry!”

She laughs, but she catches my gaze with a beaming smile. “Aliya, I mean it. I hope you’re proud of how well you’re doing too.”

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