Page 52 of The Love Playbook

Autumn

I have to bite back a grin at the wide-eyed look of almost panic on Jackson’s face as I hold out the bottle of lube to him. If I were in a different mood, I might offer to do it myself, give him a little show while I’m at it.

But I’ve put the condom on him and lubed him up. He seems to do best when he can reciprocate and has something to focus on other than his embarrassment.

All the same, another flush covers his cheeks as he gently takes the bottle.

“Would you rather do this face-to-face or doggy style?” I ask him, since I’m personally okay either way.

He tears his eyes from the bottle of lube perched between his fingers and looks at me. “Um, I, uh, what?”

This time I can’t help my chuckle. “We can do it either way. Do you have a preference?”

He looks between the bottle and me a few times, clearly paralyzed by needing to make a decision.

“Alright,” I murmur. “I’ll decide this time.” Not that I’m confident there’ll be more than a this time. “Let’s start off doggy style because I think it’ll be easier for you to see what you’re doing. But we can always change it up if you want to, okay?” I pause, waiting for acknowledgment that never comes. Placing my hand on his knee, I lean in for a quick kiss. “Jackson? Talk to me, sweetie. Are you okay?”

His throat works as he swallows, his eyes finally focusing on mine. He gives a quick nod. “Yeah,” he croaks. Clears his throat. Tries again. “Yeah. Fine. Good. Yeah. Sorry, I just …”

A wave of disappointment washes through me. I was really looking forward to this. “Hey,” I say softly. “If you’re not ready, it’s fine. I’m not trying to pressure you into doing anything you don’t want. I thought this would be fun for both of us, but we can—”

When I reach for the bottle of lube to take it from him and put it back on the nightstand, he jerks it away from me, and I cut off what I was saying in the process. His face is set in lines of determination now.

“I never said I wasn’t ready.”

I drop my hand in my lap, a smile tugging at my lips. “You’re right. You didn’t. Your behavior, however …”

“This is new for me, Autumn. Aren’t you supposed to have patience? Give me a second to collect the fragments of my exploding brain?”

I can’t help chuckling at that. “Your exploding brain?”

He lets out an almost frustrated sounding sigh. “You’re sitting there. Naked. Hot. I just gave you an amazing orgasm—your words.” He points at me. “My dick aches from all the stimulation. And now you’re offering to let me fuck your ass.” A pointed look with the use of that phrase. “Which is A—not something I expected to do ever, really, and B—something I’ve been led to believe most women don’t enjoy. And yet you seem eager. So yeah, my brain’s exploding.”

Leaning in again, I give him another soft, slow kiss. Touch has always seemed to help him regain his composure with me. I let him deepen the kiss, and he holds my head with one hand, his other arm snaking around me and pulling me close, trapping his dick between our bodies. When I rub against him, he groans into my mouth, his hand dropping to my ass and clutching me, the hard edges of the lube bottle pressing into my skin.

When he eventually ends the kiss, he looks down at me, his eyes hazy with lust and … something I can’t quite put my finger on. “Thank you,” he whispers.

I’m not entirely sure if he’s thanking me for the kiss, the lessons, what we’re about to do, or all of the above. But either way, my answer is entirely sincere. “My pleasure.”

Reaching behind me, I retrieve the lube from where he’s still holding it trapped against my ass. Then I pull his hand around, pop the cap, and dribble some lube on his fingers. “I cleaned up ahead of time, so you don’t need to worry about anything gross. And I have a towel handy too.” I reach for the hand towel on the nightstand and set it close to him. Then I turn around and present my ass to him. “Rub the lube around the outside. You can even go inside if you want to. And once that’s done, maybe make sure you’re still lubed up good, and I’m ready when you are.”

He snorts at my cheerful reassurance. But then his hand strokes my back. It’s warm and dry and reassuring. When I glance back at him over my shoulder, he meets my eyes, moving closer to me, and then his lubed fingers reach between my legs. He circles my clit a few times, then moves up and back, tracing around my vulva then back farther until he finds his goal. Gently he circles the tight ring of muscle, slick and soft, little more than a tease. It’s enjoyable, but nowhere near enough stimulation.

I crave the intensity of anal sometimes. And since I’ve been anticipating it for days now, I’m beyond ready.

The pressure of his finger becomes firmer, the circles smaller, tighter, and then he’s pressing inside me, the lube making it so easy his gasp matches mine.

“Holy shit,” he whispers, and I can’t help a giggle.

“Let’s hope not.”

He groans and chuckles at the same time. “Well, you did say I shouldn’t have to worry about that.”

Dropping my head, my shoulders shaking with laughter, it takes me a second to get ahold of myself enough to respond. “You don’t.”

“Hmm. That’s good.” He moves his finger in and out slowly, experimentally, and when I glance back at him, he has a look of intense concentration on his face.

He really is the most adorable guy I think I’ve ever been with. And the fact that we can laugh and have fun even now ranks him as one of the best too. If things were different, if I weren’t just showing him the ropes, ifIwere different, maybe we could explore what’s between us becoming something more.

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