Page 41 of Offsides

“Fuck no. That’s not it at all.” My fingers flex with the urge to grab her arms in an effort to force her to understand what I’m trying to say. “No. I’vealwaysknown you were a girl. I’vealwaysbeen painfully aware of that fact.” I wave a hand around. “You think all this, everything I’ve been doing is just to repair our friendship? I mean, don’t get me wrong, I’ve loved having you as a friend. But I’ve wanted more than that for a long time.”

Her lips part in surprise, and Isowant to lean forward and kiss them. But I know that now is definitely not the right time for that.

She shakes her head, her mouth closing, her brows pinching together. “Wait. So this is all so that … you can get in my pants?”

“God, no.” I slip to the floor and place my hands on her legs. “No, Dani. That’s not what this is about. I mean, well, of course Iwantto do those kinds of things with you. It’s just that’s notallI want.”

She shakes her head again. “But you don’t do relationships. You’ve never had a girlfriend for as long as I’ve known you. Wait, have you ever had a girlfriend ever?”

Grinning—I can’t help it, she’s just too cute—I nod. “Yes. I had a couple of girlfriends in high school. But I haven’t had a girlfriend since I met you because I always compared everyone to you and no one could measure up.”

She leans away from me, confusion back on her face as she looks all around the room, as though the walls hold the answers to the questions running through her mind. “No.” She shakes her head once more. “No. That’s not—no.” She finally brings her gaze back to mine. “You’ve always had me firmly in the friend zone. One of the guys. I’m just one of the guys to you.” Her hands come up, and she holds them out as though imploring me to verify the truth of her words.

I squint and tilt my head. “That’s not entirely true. Yeah, you’ve been one of my friends, and we talk about sports and video games like I do with my guy friends”—I hold up a finger—“which, by the way, is one of the things I find most appealing about you—but you’ve had a boyfriend the whole time. When was I supposed to make a move?”

She scoffs, pushing my hands off her legs and standing to pace the room. “That’s not true.” Whirling around, she points a finger in my face. “You know that’s not true. Luke and I broke up a million times. And you never saidanything.”

Now it’s my turn to hold up my hands imploringly. “You guys always got back together. Even the first time, when I thought maybe now would be my chance, you talked about how you knew you’d get back together. Since you were clearly still hung up on him, I figured I should wait until you were ready to move on. But that never happened, and then you actually got back together with him like you said all along. So the next time you broke up, I waited again. I wanted to make sure it would stick this time. And of course, it never did.”

I climb to my feet and take a step closer to her. “But this time was different. This time he brought a girl home. This time it seems like it’s over for good.”

She blinks rapidly as she takes in my words, spluttering a little as she tries to formulate a response. Pinching the bridge of her nose, she closes her eyes. “So our entire friendship it’s just a long con? You didn’t actually want to be my friend, you wanted to be my boyfriend.”

As I open my mouth to respond, I realize I’m about to walk into a trap. Closing my mouth, I clear my throat, thinking fast. “I always wanted to be your friend. If I hadn’t wanted that, do you think we would be here right now? Do you really think I would’ve waited around all these years hoping that you would break up with your boyfriend for good? Come on, Dani. You know me better than that. You know I’m not that patient.”

That surprises a laugh out of her, and I breathe out in relief. She waves a hand in the air as though brushing something aside. “Yeah, yeah. Okay. Point taken. Our whole friendship wasn’t a lie. At least not entirely. That’s good to know, I guess.” She spreads her hands in front of her, then lets them fall and hit her thighs. “So what now? I thought we were trying to go back to being friends, but apparently that’s not good enough anymore?”

“Dani, if you only want to be my friend, I’ll still be the best friend you’ve ever had. I’m not going to lie and say that I won’t be disappointed, but I care about you the most. Is that what you want?”

CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

Dani

I stare at Eli with my mouth hanging open, my eyes bouncing all over his face and body, taking in the hopefulness on his face and the tension held in every muscle. “Eli …” I breathe. “I’m not even sure what to say. I had no idea you felt this way.”

He throws up his hands. “Seriously? You had no idea? Me kissing you a few weeks ago didn’t give you a clue at all?”

My gaze scrambles all around the room again, hoping to find something to say that will make this all make sense. The problem is that I’m not sure what would make it make sense. I’m not sure it’s possible for it to make sense.

Eli has had a crush on me the entire time we’ve known each other? I’m still reeling from that revelation. So I have no idea what to say about anything.

“I mean,” I start, “Well, uh, I mean. Right. That kiss. You said we should pretend it never happened. That doesn’t exactly match up with your declaration of unrequited love.”

He holds up a finger. “I never said the L word.”

I can’t help laughing, and it seems to break the tension between us, or at least reduce it a little bit. “Okay, fine. I rescind my use of the L word. Regardless”—I make air quotes with my fingers—“‘let’s pretend this never happened,’ doesn’t exactly tell a girl you’ve been wanting to kiss her for years.”

“I figured I’d fucked everything up. You practically sprinted out of here like the place was on fire. And then you wouldn’t respond to my texts. I just didn’t want you to hate me. The last thing I wanted was to lose my best friend. Kissing you then, like that, was a miscalculation on my part. I moved too early. And then I messed everything up. And I’m still trying to make up for the yardage lost as a penalty.”

Grinning, I place my hands on my hips. “Leave it to you to work in a football analogy while discussing the possibility of our friendship turning into a romantic relationship.”

Hope lights up his face. “So it is a possibility?”

Part of me wants to hedge, to drag this out and torture him just a little bit longer. I feel like he deserves it after the shit he’s put me through since Christmas break.

But I can’t keep it up for long. Tapping my chin with one finger, I hum thoughtfully. “I suppose it’s a possibility.”

It has to be, really. Because otherwise? I’m not sure we can have any other kind of relationship after this.

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