Page 51 of Offsides

After my workout, I come home to find Autumn and Ellie in the living room. Usually I don’t have strong feelings one way or the other about the presence of any of my roommates, though I’m mostly happy to have the house to myself.

But this time, I’m glad they’re here.

“So, uh,” I start as I take off my jacket and toe off my boots. “Something weird happened.”

Ellie hits pause on whatever show they’re watching—some kind of reality cooking show from the looks of it—and they both turn to give me their attention.

“What happened?” Autumn asks from her usual spot on the armchair while Ellie pats the couch cushion next to her.

I perch on the end of the couch, my hands in my lap. “Eli wants to take me out on a date.”

They both blink at me, and then Ellie bursts out laughing.

For her part, Autumn just gives me that Sphinx-like smile of hers and props her chin on her hand. “And why is that weird?” To her credit, she asks the question calmly. Like we’re having a normal conversation, even though Ellie’s still cracking up on the other end of the couch.

“Well …” I glance at Ellie, who’s now wiping her eyes with the sleeve of her sweatshirt. “I mean it’s Eli. And me. We’ve been hanging out for years. Even though things have … changed … between us, I didn’t really think we needed to go ondates.”

Autumn tilts her head to one side, considering this. “Have you been on a lot of dates in the past?”

My eyes dart around the room, and I rub one palm on my thigh. This feels like some kind of trick question. “Define a lot?”

Waving a hand, Autumn dismisses that. “You dated the same guy off and on for years. What were dates like with him?”

I snort laugh when I think about the idea of Luke taking me on a date.

Autumn just watches me expectantly, eyebrows raised, and Ellie finally stops laughing. In fact, she leans forward, turning to face me. “Hang on, hang on,” she says, one hand extended. “Wait wait wait. Why did Autumn asking about your last boyfriend taking you on dates make you laugh like that? Hedidtake you on dates, right? Right?” She looks almost panicky as she glances at Autumn, who remains as placid as ever.

Another snort comes out of me, and I shake my head. “I mean, if you count protein shakes at the gym as a date? Sure. Or driving together to lifting competitions.” I clasp my hands by my cheek and bat my eyes. “So romantic.”

“It could be romantic,” Autumn puts in over Ellie’s derisive snort. She glances at Ellie. “It could. Think about it. Lifting is a shared interest for them. It would be easy to make it both a romantic experience and one that would strengthen their relationship. I’m sure competitions are stressful, so doing something for your partner to show you care about and support them would be both romantic and sweet.”

Ellie relents, tilting her head from side to side. “Okay. I guess that’s a good point. Still, though, it’s definitely not a date.”

“True.” Autumn returns her gaze to me. “Did you find traveling to competitions together romantic?”

“Um …” I hedge. Was it romantic? At the time I was glad to spend time together, but, no, it was never anything I would ever call romantic. “Not so much, no.”

Autumn hums thoughtfully, and Ellie remains blessedly silent. “Did you feel supported and cared for?”

I open my mouth, but pause to consider the question before answering. Did I? Was Luke ever supportive?

I mean, on the face of it, yes. He wanted me to do well, pushed me to succeed. But it blended in with my dad’s version of support which felt a lot more like berating than encouragement, now that I’ve gained enough time and distance to look at it objectively. Luke’s support, much like my dad’s, seemed to hinge around all the ways I could’ve—should’ve—done better, and never on celebrating my actual success or accomplishments.

I’m not a world-class lifter. I never have been. And I don’t think changing focus to Olympic lifting would’ve had the results either my dad or my ex boyfriend wanted it to. Which is part of the reason I refused.

That and I was really tired of the both of them trying to tell me what to do, and graduating and going to college somewhere else seemed like the best way to put a stop to it.

I just figured Luke and I both needed some time to grow up, experience more of the world than a tiny town in Montana.

God, I should’ve cut him loose years ago, shouldn’t I? That first time he broke up with me, I should’ve let him go and gotten over him and moved on.

And while I knew Autumn and Ellie at that point, we were acquaintances who said hi in the dorm halls, not actual friends yet, so I couldn’t have turned to them for advice and support like I do now.

I was a loner most of that first semester. My roommate at the time and I tolerated each other, by which I mean we mostly just stayed out of each other’s way. We weren’t friends, though we didn’t hate each other either. But I wasn’t upset when she opted to live with one of her other friends sophomore year.

It wasn’t until Eli and I became friends that I started having people to hang out with. The girls in my dorm seemed silly—even Autumn and Ellie, while they seemed nice enough, were not people I would’ve chosen to hang out with, what with Autumn’s boho fairy girl vibe and Ellie’s classic girl-next-door look, so at odds with my lifetime of cultivating a tomboy persona.

When Piper moved in with me, I wasn’t sure how well we’d get along at first. To be honest, the best I hoped for was a repeat of freshman year where we mostly avoided each other. To my surprise, she was as interested in football as I was, though I did think it was kinda weird she went to watch their practices. That was until I learned that her brother was the new transfer quarterback.

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