Page 12 of Bond Strength

In the past week and a half, I’d seen Noah more than I had in years. And his constant appearances were fucking with me in the worst way. I should’ve been running far and fast from him, yet instead, my feet seemed to have a mind of their own and kept veering in his direction. Except this time, it was to escape the chaos of Rory’s overly full apartment. My siblings would give me shit for not saying hi later, but for now, I needed space to breathe. If I tossed myself in the middle of that, I’d most likely go full nonverbal.

I slipped past Noah, and my shoulder accidentally brushed him. My whole body went on alert as if I’d gotten zapped rather than a simple brush. I zipped past him and clutched my cider a little harder. Even though I didn’t go to Rory and August’s place much, I knew the best route to getting outside.

The door to the backyard was within sight. Thank fuck.

Ollie stepped right in my way.

Goddamnit.

“Liam and I had a going bet on whether you’d show. Now he’s gotta pay up.” Ollie crossed his arms, and a huge grin spread on his face.

“My sense of familial obligation is decreasing by the second. If Rory stays in the kitchen, I’m afraid he’s going to end up naked and slathered in butter.”

“Your family is weird as shit.” Liam came up next to Ollie and looped an arm around his waist. They were as affectionate as they’d always been, so the transition from friends to dating hadn’t been much to get used to.

“I’m not going to refute that.” My pulse had calmed down, but I wove past Ollie and grabbed the handle for the back door anyway.

“How was your date last week?” Ollie asked, bulldozing in like usual. I regretted every instance I mentioned my attempts at datingto my family, yet I continued to do it over and over. Maybe I had untapped masochistic tendencies.

“Well, she didn’t throw my beer in my face,” I said. My gut twisted. While she hadn’t been a right fit, I found something soul-wearying and exhausting about throwing myself out there. The longer the search went on, the more I felt like the failed project was me, not dating.

When I was with my family, I simply existed. I didn’t have to paste on extra smiles or try to figure out why someone was pissed about a straightforward answer. They were all as clear with communicating as me—or at least attempted with me.

The outside world, though? Detrimental to my health some days.

Ollie wrinkled his nose. “I’m sorry, man. One of these days, one of those girls is going to see your worth.”

“Or I could spend more time with my projects,” I responded.

“Next, you’ll be bringing home a bionic girlfriend,” Liam teased.

“You joke, but the idea sounds brilliant to me.” I lifted my cider with one hand and twisted the knob with the other. “I’m escaping outside.”

I slipped outside without interruption and sucked in a long, slow breath of the cool, crisp air. Rory had a gorgeous backyard, with a sprawling lawn and several trees framing the way. The full moon shone radiantly, with a lunar halo that grabbed my attention. Humans spent all this time focused on fighting each other, launching war after war, when we could be out there.

Exploring the vast beauty, creation, and destruction.

Not for the first time, the itch to be working in a different field crept under my veins. Truth be told, I’d always wanted employment in a job that would further the exploration into space, but when I graduated, I went with the place I’d interned at. The familiar was a terrible tug for me, and in a way, sometimes it held me captive.

I settled into one of the outdoor chairs and sipped at my cider. The burst of sweetness traveled down my throat, and I savored it. At least tonight offered clearer skies than normal. My mind had quieted, the hum under my skin soothing.

The door creaked, and Noah crept out. My shoulders tensed, but then I noticed the phone held up to his ear. He walked past me a few paces and stood in the grass. He must not have realized I’d come out here.

“Emily, if you think the baggie he left in your bathroom is a stash of coke, flush it down the toilet.” Noah’s voice deepened. “No, don’t test it out.” He heaved a sigh. “Don’t call him to pick it up either. I don’t care if you guys shared a friendship yam or a sweet potato of kindness. For the love of all that’s holy, delete his number and flush the substance.”

I took another sip of the cider. His family had always been as needy as mine, and Emily seemed of the age to be making bad decisions. Rory had never left that phase, so I could relate. Noah always had a lot of people making demands on his time, but the shift and subsequent divide in high school left bitterness swilling in my gut.

“Okay.” He paced back and forth on the grass. “Go visit Mom in the morning. She’s been needing a bit extra attention.” He heaved out another sigh. “Yeah, I’m at a party right now.” A pause stretched out, and curiosity pulsed through me. “Love you too, Em. Stay out of trouble.”

With that, he ended the call and slipped the phone into his pocket. His gaze landed on me.

My heart thumped a little harder.

“Fuck, how much of that did you hear?” Noah squeezed his nape.

“Does it matter?” I wouldn’t judge him for talking to family. “I’m more concerned with you stalking me.”

“Okay, you, of all people, know how insistent Rory is. And I was at the shop setting up an appointment with August when they both started hounding me to come.” Noah leaned against the wall beside me. His proximity made goose bumps emerge on my skin, and I still wasn’t sure how I felt about that.

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