Page 67 of Max's Mission

Twenty-Eight

Max couldn’t believe he’d let himself get so swept away. It never once crossed his mind that they needed protection. When he’d slipped his hand into her pants and discovered her bare butt cheek, rationality evaporated. Every animal instinct he had came out to play, and his only thought had been how quickly he could get inside her.

But he wasn’t mad about it. Apprehensive, sure. Especially with her initial reaction. But at his age, he’d given up hope of ever being a dad.

Margot blinked at him, her blue eyes wide. “Why?”

He rolled away to sit up. “Hang on.” This conversation could take a bit, and he didn’t want to be sticky for it. He doubted she did, either.

Getting up, he went to the bathroom and washed quickly, then wet a clean rag with warm water and brought it out to her. They needed a shower, but this would do for now.

Once he’d taken care of her, he put the rag on the nightstand and climbed in beside her, tugging the blankets over them.

“Are you going to tell me now why the possibility of us having a baby makes you happy?” She’d curled into his side, using his shoulder as a pillow.

Max toyed with the ends of her hair and drummed his fingers on his chest as he stared up at the ceiling. “Have any of the guys mentioned my past?”

“Your past? Just your military stuff. I think one of them alluded to a relationship you had once. Is that what this is about?”

“Yeah. I was engaged once. A long time ago. Her name was Lotte. She was beautiful. And exotic. Our relationship was a whirlwind. We met at a bar in Italy when I was stationed there. I was young and dumb and enamored with this—vision—who’d taken a shine to me. I let her seduce me, and the next thing I knew, she was shoving a positive pregnancy test under my nose.”

Margot shifted, propping up on an elbow to look at him. “Did she abort it?”

“No. She wanted the baby. I did too. I thought I had it all, you know? A great career. A beautiful Italian woman at my side. A baby on the way.” He rolled his eyes, remembering the conversation he overheard with Lotte and her best friend.

“It wasn’t yours, was it?”

“No. She was pregnant when we met. Anyway, before I knew all that, I proposed, thinking the baby was mine. We’d been engaged about four months when I came home from work for lunch. She was out in the garden with her best friend, Carla. I’d picked up enough Italian to realize they were talking about me and the baby.”

“They didn’t hear you coming?”

“No. You couldn’t see the front door from the patio, and I didn’t call out to her when I came in. It only took a few moments of listening to realize Carla was surprised I wasn’t questioning the baby’s size. Lotte wouldn’t let me come to any of her appointments, saying that was how they did it in Italy.” He lifted a shoulder. “I didn’t have any Italian friends with kids to know any different. She told Carla I thought everything was normal.Then Carla asked how she planned to explain the baby being full term in size even though it would be six weeks earlier than I was expecting. Her answer? Gestational diabetes.”

“Oh, Max.” She laid a hand on his chest.

He covered it, linking their fingers. “I listened a little longer. Carla asked if she’d heard from Giacomo. Lotte laughed and said it didn’t matter if he came around again or not. He’d served his purpose.” Twenty years later, he could still feel the rage that had coursed through his blood. And the sadness. In an instant, she’d dashed his dreams.

“I couldn’t hold my tongue after that. I stepped into view, and she knew from the second she saw my face that I heard everything. When I asked her why she’d do that, she said she did it so she could see the world.”

Margot’s eyes rounded. “She got pregnant and faked who the baby daddy was so she could travel? Did she not realize she’d have to take care of a child while she did that?”

“I don’t know. I didn’t ask that question. All I cared about was that she lied to me. I told her we were done, then went inside to pack.”

“Did she try to stop you?”

“Briefly. She followed me into the bedroom and tried to use her body to convince me to stay. But she disgusted me now. She’d used me—used Giacomo and the innocent life they created—for her own gain.”

He inhaled a deep breath, letting go of the anger that always simmered to the surface when he thought about Lotte. “After I left, I went and stayed with a friend from base. Luckily, I got deployed a few weeks after I moved out. My friend enlisted a few others to get the rest of my stuff while I was gone. A few months after that, my stint in Aviano was up, and I went back to the U.S.”

“Did she ever try to contact you?”

“A couple of times. But I never answered the door or returned her calls. Then I left the country, and she had no way of doing so. I did hear from a friend, though, that she snagged some poor bastard and got married a month before the baby came. I don’t know if it was the faceless Giacomo or some other sap. I just hope whoever it was gave that kid a good life.” That was his only regret in the situation. He hadn’t just left Lotte. But he couldn’t be a father to a child that wasn’t his when he didn’t love or trust the mother. It was a recipe for failure.

“After I left Italy, I swore off women for a long time. I’d go out with buddies and drink and have a good time, but I never went home with anyone, never dated. I’d flirt, but that was all I wanted. It took a couple of years before I was ready for more. Even then, I kept things light. I just wasn’t interested in a commitment.”

“Is that why you’re not married?”

“Mostly. That and I never found anyone who made me want to trust them with everything.” He turned an intense stare on her. “Until you showed up. I’ve waited a long time to feel about a woman the way I feel about you. So, no. I’m not upset if we created a new life today.” He held up a finger. “Just to be clear, that was not my intention. I lost my head, and for that I’m sorry. It’s put you in a position you shouldn’t be in.”

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