Page 85 of Malibu Rising

“Thank you,” Jay said, nodding.

“And, look, if you play it right, a decade from now you could be doing some of the shit I’m doing, putting your name on stuff, taking paychecks. Everyone’s throwing money around now. It’s like there’s too much of it all of a sudden. It’s all just gonna get bigger and bigger. And I’m telling you, sometimes the financial security and the peace is even sweeter than the victory. I get up every day and surf because I want to. Not because I have to. Do you know how long it’s been since I could say that?”

“Right,” Jay said. “I bet.”

“When it’s just you and the wave, and you’re not thinking about stats or training or …”

Jay was half listening, fixated on his uncertain future, the one he still could not bear to say out loud to anyone but Lara. His retirement wouldn’t be like Matt’s. He had to retireandgive up the act itself. There was no real “purity” to exchange for what he was losing. He was just losing everything.

Jay had only begun to be considered one of the best—his careerwas just taking off. It had been for only a couple years he’d even had all of this attention. But it had not taken him long to acclimate to the adulation. And now, his heart was going to cost him the very thing that made him feel exceptional.

He was the eldest son of Mick Riva—wasn’t he supposed to be the best at something? For a moment, Jay considered the idea that he would rather die being great than live being ordinary. He wasn’t sure he could bear the stain of obscurity.

“Look, I gotta head out,” Matt said, looking at his watch. “I got a flight back home in the morning. If I miss it, my wife will kill me.”

“All right, man, take care,” Jay said, and then he added, “I’d love to come out there and pick your brain sometime. You know, about the boards you’re shaping. What you’re up to now that you’re, you know …”

“Old?”

Jay smiled. “Retired.”

“Sure thing, man. Talk soon.”

Just as Matt walked away, Jay felt a hand intertwine itself with his.

“Sorry, the line took forever,” Lara said. “There are way too many people at this party. Is it always like this?”

Jay looked around, taking note of the bodies in the rest of the house. People were starting to pack themselves tight into small spaces. Couples had taken refuge on the stairs and girls were sitting on the floor. Through the windows it was plain to see that the front lawn was as packed as the back.

“Actually,” Jay said. “Thisisa lot. Even for this party.”

“Is there somewhere more quiet we can go?” Lara asked.

“Yeah,” Jay said. “Of course. What were you thinking? The beach?”

“The beach feels a little …” Lara made a face that Jay tried desperately to discern. What did she mean? The beach was too romantic? Too cheesy? Too cold? Too dark? He wasn’t sure.

“All right,” Jay said and he took her by the hand and out the frontdoor, past the partiers, past the valets, and then into the relative quiet darkness of the makeshift parking lot the attendants had made of his sister’s side yard.

He walked right past two people making out with a fervor that struck him as immensely funny until he realized it was Kit’s friend Vanessa and that DJ they’d hired. He instantly looked away and then found himself looking back, stunned at the intensity. He had no idea Vanessa had it in her.

“Uh,” Jay said, trying to forget what he’d seen. “Let’s go to Hud’s truck.” Jay’s own car had no top and no doors, but he knew Hud’s truck would be unlocked. They headed straight for it.

Jay didn’t just want to get Lara alone because he wanted to have sex with her. Yes, if Lara made a move on him, if she laid her long bare legs across him, he would strike. But he also wanted to talk to her. He wanted to ask her how she had been and what she was up to and did she think she would still like him if he was a nobody? He wanted to find out where she grew up and what her favorite movie was.

Jay came upon Hud’s truck in the second row, toward the very back of the pack. He pulled Lara toward it, and opened the door for her. There wasn’t much room and Lara had to squeeze into the ten-inch crack between door and frame. She managed. And when Jay shut the door behind him, they were finally alone.

“Hi,” Jay said.

“Hi.” Lara smiled.

Then neither of them said anything more. They simply looked at each other, comfortable and silent.

“You’re different than I thought you’d be,” Lara said, finally.

“What does that mean?” Jay asked. He shifted slightly so he could face her, bending his knee and resting his leg on the bench seat.

Lara shrugged softly. “You’re much calmer than I figured.”