Page 111 of Carrie Soto Is Back

I start to walk away, but then I turn back.

“Hey,” I say, calling to her. “Thank you for being here. And for supporting me in this, from the beginning. The whole year. Even though it’s crazy.”

Gwen smiles. “Do you know what part of ‘If—’ is actually relevant right now? To this moment? ‘If you can make one heap of all your winnings / And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss, / And lose, and start again at your beginnings / And never breathe a word about your loss.’ ”

She must be messing with me. Surely she knows she’s just described my greatest fear. But no, I can tell from the look on herface that she sincerely thinks that I’m that brave, that I am doing this because I am okay with losing big. Not because I am terrified of losing at all.

And it stuns me silent, for a moment: just how vast the gap is between who I am and how people see me.

I am so much smaller than the Carrie Soto in Gwen’s head.

SOTO VS. DRYER

Wimbledon 1995

First Round

As I step out ontothe court, I feel the sun blazing down. I hear the commotion of the crowds. I look up to see stands full of well-dressed Brits with large hats and fascinators. I am flooded with the comfort of the scent of Wimbledon—fresh-cut grass and Pimm’s and lemon.

I am home.

I bounce on my toes, feeling the grass and dirt beneath my white Break Points.

I look across the court at Cami Dryer. She is young, not even eighteen.

I smile and shake her hand as we come together at the net.

She is adorable—all perky and eager. She shakes my hand with an excitement that reminds me of myself when I was younger. And I feel this sudden contentment deep within my gut.

You could not pay me enough money to go back to being seventeen. When I was seventeen, my talent was all potential and noproof. The world was a giant set of unknowns, barely any past to pull from.

I am so grateful, right now, for every match and every win and every loss and every lesson that I have behind me. It feels so good, right now, to be thirty-seven years old. To have figured at leastsomethings out.

To know the ground underneath my feet.

Poor Cami Dryer doesn’t know what is about to hit her. She wins the coin toss and calls first serve. I get into position and take her in two sets.

Transcript

BBC Sports Radio London

SportsWorldwith Brian Cress

And in women’s tennis it’s been nearly a fortnight of stunning wins and crushing losses.

London’s own Nicki Chan has sailed through each of her matches. As have favorites such as Ingrid Cortez and Natasha Antonovich. Meanwhile, it’s been a hair-raiser for firebrand Carrie Soto. She has clawed her way through the five rounds—beating Brits Cami Dryer and Lucy Cameron in the first and second, Swede Celine Nystrom in the third, and the Baltimore Baseliner Carla Perez in the round of sixteen.

She’s now defeated Italian Odette Moretti in the quarterfinals.

Bringing her to the semifinals, where she and Russian phenom Natasha Antonovich will go head-to-head.

Transcript

SportsHour USA

The Mark Hadley Show

Mark Hadley:And wow, Carrie Soto.

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