Page 45 of A Soldier's Return

“Oh, Eli.”

His features were grim. “Apparently, there were still opposition forces in the area angry that the leadership of this village would accept foreign aid workers. They killed fifteen villagers at a peaceful market square for no reason, along with a sweet orphan girl who only wanted to help.”

“Miri,” she whispered, heart aching for the devastation she heard in his voice.

“She died instantly. Justine was conscious and in agony for only a moment after I arrived on scene. I tried to stabilize her, but she’d lost too much blood and the shock was too great. She went into cardiac arrest. I told you I did CPR while we tried to call for help but... It was too late. I couldn’t save either of them.”

She had no words, nothing that could comfort this sort of deep pain.

“Miri was only a girl, with a future that was much brighter than it had been a few months earlier, before Justine came into her life. I hate knowing that future was wiped out because of me.”

“Why do you blame yourself?”

“I could have made other choices. I shouldn’t have let them go into the market alone. I should have been with them. We should have taken more protection with us.”

“Could any of those things have stopped what happened?”

He looked helplessly at her and she knew the answer. No. He would have been a target, too.

She removed the omelet from the stove to a plate, choosing her words with care. “You can’t blame yourself, Eli. You didn’t plant the explosives and you couldn’t have known someone else would. You were there to help people.”

“I know that intellectually. Convincing my emotions isn’t quite as easy.”

The torment on his features broke her heart. She was a nurse, driven to ease suffering where she saw it, and she hated knowing she couldn’t help him.

She couldn’t resist going to him and wrapping her arms around his waist. She wanted to tell him not to blame himself, that she understood he had been there to help others and he couldn’t hold himself responsible for the evil actions of a few, but she knew that would be cold comfort.

Still, something in her touch must have calmed him, as she hoped. After a few moments, she felt some of the tension in his muscles seep away. He returned her hug with a grateful embrace before he stepped away.

“I’m sorry. I keep thinking I’ve dealt with it. It was six months ago and most of the time I’m fine. Every once in a while, I let down my guard and the memories wash over me like a flash flood.”

“I’m glad I was here to keep them from drowning you.”

“So am I.” He gestured to the table. “But I hate to waste a good omelet, especially when you’ve gone to all the trouble to make it. Should we eat?”

For all the sadness of his story, she found the meal surprisingly restful. They spoke of mutual acquaintances and some of the changes that had come over the town in the years since both of them had lived here. She didn’t want their time together to end, but the long day finally caught up with her and she couldn’t hold back a yawn.

He glanced at his watch, shook his head and rose. “I should go. It’s nearly two. Thank you for the omelet and the evening. I enjoyed both.”

“Thankyou. I forgot all about missing Skye.”

He shrugged into his jacket and headed for the door. She walked him there, with Max trotting at their heels.

“If you want to take Max home with you, I should be okay. I feel silly I was ever worried about being alone. This house just feels so big when I’m the only one here, especially when I know Sonia and Rosa aren’t in town.”

“Keep him until Skye gets home, if you want. He’s good company. To be honest, you’re better company to him than I will probably be. He’s been lonely, I’m afraid. I think he misses my dad. And I’ll be at the rehab center most of the day, so he would be alone otherwise.”

He planned to spend his Sunday with his father, which filled her with a soft tenderness. “You’re a very sweet man, Eli.”

He raised an eyebrow. “Why? Because I have a good relationship with my dad?”

“You care. Too many people who have been through what you have would harden their soul against letting in any kind of softer feelings, but you haven’t. You care about your father, you cared about Jim the other day on the beach, you care about our patients and about your refugee patients thousands of miles away.”

She had to kiss him. Though she knew it was potentially dangerous, she couldn’t resist rising on her tiptoes and pressing her mouth to his.

He remained frozen for one breathless moment, and then he lowered his mouth to hers and kissed her as she realized both of them had been craving all night.

It was raw and hot, his mouth searching hers, his body pressed against her. She realized as his arms tightened around her that she had been fooling herself. She hadn’t kissed him out of tenderness or empathy but because she had been craving his kiss since those magical moments the day before, outside the beach gate.

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