Page 63 of Vera Wong's Guide to Snooping (on a Dead Man)

TJ snorts. “I’m glad to hear that she passed your test.”

“And Kit and Lomax, they will be okay. They are good kids too, they will find place in the world.”

“I don’t know. I know they’re great in person, and they’ve got good hearts and good heads on their shoulders, but on paper, they don’t look so great.”

“We will figure out. One step at one time, TJ. You don’t have to take on the whole world at once. Just take one step.”

TJ nods, feeling like the huge boulder that’s been crushing him all this time has lifted, just a little. “I think I’m gonna have some of this cake after all.”

“I know. No one can resist jiggly sponge cake.”

Something about being around Vera makes TJ feel so safe, which is ironic given he’s here tonight to make sure she is safe. Still, he can’t complain. It feels nice, not being the one that everybody has to depend on for once. To have someone he can lean on. TJ bites into the airy soft cake and releases a long breath. Maybe Vera is right. Maybe, despite the shattered mess that his life has turned into, somehow, it’s going to end up being okay.

Twenty

MILLIE

Millie likes Oliver. Like, really likes him, in a genuine way that she hasn’t felt in a long time. They’ve hung out two more times now, and she’s pretty sure he likes her too. Usually she’s so good at telling when guys are into her; she can sense it in the way their gazes touch her, quick and shy, darting away when she makes eye contact. But with Oliver, she can’t be sure, and it’s because she likes him, and the liking him is clouding her judgment. Father and Mother would—

It’s best to not dwell on what Father and Mother would do.

Last night, Mother had knocked on her door before coming in—that’s what they do, they knock, then without waiting for a reply, they go in. “What’s going on with this guy you’re seeing?” Mother had asked.

“We’re taking it slow. Being careful,” Millie said to her.

Mother had regarded Millie with such an intensity that Millie felt her skin shriveling, every inch of her wanting to hide fromMother.Somewhere out there, she thought,there are young women who aren’t afraid of their mothers.

“If it’s not going anywhere, end it,” Mother said finally. “You don’t want to get hurt, Millie.”

Millie nodded, the knots in her muscles loosening ever so slightly.See, she told herself,Mother is just being caring. She cares about me.

“One more date,” Mother had said. “Then, if nothing happens, move on. I’ve taught you better than this.”

More than anything, Millie hates disappointing Mother. She nodded again. “I know. I’m sorry.”

“Young people nowadays,” Mother had muttered as she left the room.

And now, as Millie sits on a picnic blanket at Golden Gate Park, she can’t help stealing multiple glances at Oliver. He’s rolled up his sleeves to his elbows and is taking out food he’s prepared at home, and the sight is just so unbelievably sexy.

“—has been teaching me for weeks, and I think she’ll be proud of me,” he says. He stops and waves a hand in front of Millie’s face. “Earth to Millie.”

“Sorry,” she says, snapping out of her daze.

“What were you thinking of?”

“Nothing,” Millie says, squashing all thoughts of Mother deep, deep down.Quick, change the subject.She focuses on the containers of food. “Wow, Vera taught you how to make these?”

“Yup. I’ve been going to her place every week for cooking lessons. It’s weird, I grew up in a pretty patriarchal household, and my mom was the one who cooked every meal. After she died, my dad took over, but he never got into it, you know? Like, I got the sense that he only cooked out of necessity. There was no love inthe food. It was bland, and he rotated between three or four dishes. When I moved out, I didn’t even think to learn how to cook or anything. I think that subconsciously, I’d internalized the whole gendered bullshit, and I was expecting my future wife to cook for me. God, I sound like an asshole.” He scratches the back of his head, then adds, “And that’s probably because I was. But I realized I need to work on myself. Unlearn all of the misogynistic crap I grew up with. Learn to cook actual good food. And Vera’s a great teacher. I’m lucky to have her.”

“Wow,” Millie says. She hadn’t thought it would be possible to like him even more than she already does, but here they are.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to ramble. Okay, so here we have roast duck sandwiches, sweet and sour fish, and scallion oil noodles. And for dessert, black sticky rice with coconut cream.”

“Wow,” Millie says again. Can she not think of better things to say, for goodness’ sake? When she is with other men, Millie is sweet and funny and cute, and when she is with Oliver, she is reduced to one-word answers only.

Mother’s voice flashes through her mind.Last chance; if nothing happens, end it.

Millie knows Mother is right. She doesn’t want to waste her time on someone who doesn’t know what he wants. She deserves more than that. She needs to know if he likes her too.

---