He closes his eyes and breathes deeply, in and out, and again. He drops my hand.
“You should remove yourself from this particular weakness entirely,” I murmur, “I can’t have anything happen to you because of me.”
Once the duke has been dealt with, when Nicostratus is a prince without troubles and my troubles are solely related to medicine... Perhaps then there could be a chance for us.
I breathe deeply on the dream.I’ll do everything to work towards it.
But I can’t promise him more until it’s reached.
“You’re ending things between us?”
I say nothing, but my silence is its own answer. His gaze holds mine, and for a moment, I think he might spill a tear.
“I just want to be your hope,” he whispers.
I briefly shut my eyes. “You coming here before anything else,” I murmur. “It’s already made me lighter.”
His breath hitches. He shakes his head over and over.
I tug the golden feather from my belt and hold it out to him, but he closes his hand around mine and pushes it back towards me.
“Nicostratus . . .”
“I’ll keep my distance. But . . . keep this.”
When he’s gone, I take water from the canal and pour it gently over the planting. It forms a smooth layer of pale mud. Murky. A stagnant pool in the darkness.
I glance through the mist toward the crumbling ruins.
What kind of light survives a place like this?
I find Casimiria meditating alone in the courtyard.
As if sensing me, she opens her eyes. “One thing to know about me.” She rises in a single, graceful motion and dusts off her robe. “I’m quite meddlesome. I listened in on you and Nicostratus.”
I blink at her. Then, unexpectedly, a short laugh escapes. “You are certainly his mother.”
She lifts her chin with quiet pride and a dry, unapologetic smile, and beckons me forward.
We descend into the ruins, deeper than I’ve gone before. A small orb of light flickers in her palm, casting long shadows that stretch along moss-eaten stone.
“Would you have shown me this,” I ask, “if Nicostratus hadn’t said something?”
“I’m still not sure I should.”
I glance at her sharply.
She stops at a wall overgrown with ivy and parts the veil with one hand to reveal a weathered door. “He called it light. Others call it hope.” Her voice turns cool. “I call it stagnation.”
The hinges creak as the door swings open; behind it, stacks of tomes on sagging shelves, every surface bulging with a forgotten time. A library, swallowed by dust and silence.
I step inside, heart lifting as I run my fingers along the spines. “This is history.”
Casimiria’s voice is flat. “History is written by victors. This is folklore.”
I flip through a book at random. Ancient scriptions, ones I’ve never seen before. “No,” I say, shaking my head. “This is a vault of wisdom.”
Her gaze sharpens. “It’s the past, Cael. Not the now. Not the future.”