Page 112 of Crocodile Tears

“Well, look at it out here.” He waved his hand at their surroundings. “Most of Europe is in chaos, various warlords are fighting over what remains of the land, and the scavengers make it impossible to cross the continent without armed protection. In Britain, at least there’s some kind of order.”

“Because we have the IS system?”

“Isn’t that better than this kind of disorder?”

“Do you think it’s right that your father died because you refused to become an IS?”

“My father didn’t want anyone’s help,” he responded stubbornly.

“Just as well, since nobody was offering.” Peter shrugged. “And what about Liz? Is it right that the only way for her to get medical aid for her mother was to sell her body to a man who abused her?”

“I’m not saying it’s right – I’m saying that’s how it’s always been,and given how the world has changed in the past sixty-odd years, maybe it’s the best we can do right now. Maybe, one day, we’ll work out a way for everyone to have enough, so nobody needs to serve anyone else, but it’s not going to happen just because people like you save a few sad indies from their fate.”

Peter mused on that for a moment and then leaned sideways, so their shoulders were touching.

“Are you saying that because life and labour have become so cheap, we shouldn’t value them?” he asked.

“Why are you discussing this with me?” Josiah snapped, feeling out of his depth. “What the hell difference does it make whether I agree with you or not?”

“Because I want you to like me.”

Josiah stared at him blankly. “Why?”

Peter laughed. “Don’t be an idiot – I want you to like me because I’m hoping that one day you’ll kiss me again, you fool.”

Josiah’s stomach flipped. He glanced sideways to find his captain gazing at him intently.

“I already like you, Joe – very much. When I look at you, I see a good man who hasn’t had an easy life. You’ve grown a tough shell in order to get by, but I’m hoping there’s room enough inside that shell for two.”

His mouth felt suddenly dry, and he thought he could drown in Peter’s kind brown eyes. He cleared his throat.

“I’m not what you think. I’m not such a good man, and if you knew what really happened at Rosengarten, you’d realise that, sir.”

“Please – when we’re alone together, call me Peter. And I think you are a good man, Joe, regardless of what went down at Rosengarten.”

Leaning back on the palms of his hands, Josiah stared out across the water with Hattie resting her head on his lap. She felt warm, reliable, and strong – just like the man sitting next to him. It would be so easy to sit here and enjoy their company.

Pushing Hattie away gently, he forced himself to his feet. “We won’t have many opportunities to be alone together going forward, sir, because when we’ve completed our mission, I’m going to ask for a transfer.”

Peter sighed. “I’m sorry you feel that way, and even more sorry if you’re moving on from a job you love because of me.”

“You have to understand, sir – the army gave me a chance when nobody else would.” He gazed out at the grey waters ahead. “There aren’t many career opportunities for Quarrie scum like me. Most of us either become ISs or stay in the Quarterlands and die young. I got out because the army offered me a job without putting an ID tag on me and a chip under my skin. I owe them, sir, and I don’t like standing by and watching you screw them over, because that’s what you’re doing by using their AVs and supplies to smuggle contracted servants out of Britain.”

“I can see that’s how it looks from your point of view, and I respect you for that,” Peter said quietly. “I like your certainties, Joe, but I don’t share them. I wish life was simpler.”

“Don’t we all, sir.” He turned to go.

“Joe – you were lucky,” Peter called after him. “The quota of free citizens the army takes on becomes smaller every year, while the number of indies grows. To me, those ISs look like cannon fodder – they aren’t soldier material; they only join up to get fed and to send their contract fee to their families.”

“They offered me an IS contract, but I refused,” Josiah said stiffly.

“Then the army must have seen what a fine soldier you’d make. Not many are given that opportunity.”

“I can’t repay them by joining in your lie. I won’t betray your secret, sir, but I can’t stay working with you when I know what you’re doing.”

He heard Hattie give a little whine as he returned to the roof hatch and jumped back down into the truck.

The sound of Alexander moving around in the guest room again jolted Josiah out of the memory. He glanced at his bedside clock to find it was 5.30a.m.: a respectable time to get up.

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