Page 114 of Fighting Spirit

Fuck, I have seriously had my head up my ass.

In trying not to upset anyone, in all my ‘waiting for the right moment’ to tell the guys about Ruth, I’ve been missing out on the best thing in my life. I want Ruth, I want us together, all in. I want to take her out on dates, I want her at my games with my name and number on her back, I want her to meet my friends and for them to wonder how the hell I got a girl like her to give me the time of day.

I never intended my relationship to be a secret, but in all my attempts to avoid conflict, I’ve turned into the exact kind of coward I never wanted to be.

It’s going to suck. There’ll probably be some bullshit speculation once I join the staff, people thinking I’m just like Simmons. The guys are going to be pissed, and it’ll be one more thing to add to the ever-widening gap between us, but I have to make it work. Ruth’s worth it.

By the time we pull into the lot outside my building, Ruth is asleep. I reposition her so she’s not leaning against the door and then round the hood. Once I have the passenger side open I carefully unbuckle her, holding my breath like even that could wake her. The tote bag ends up looped over one shoulder as I slip my arms behind her back and under her legs to lift her against my chest.

The truck door slams shut and I swear under my breath, but Ruth doesn’t stir. She’s a solid weight in my arms, all toned limbs and muscle, but still so fragile. I adjust her a little so that her head lolls against my shoulder as we make our way toward the door.

“Fuck,” I mutter as I remember I put my keys in my back pocket. There’s no way I can get them out without putting Ruth down. I take a couple of steps back, trying to figure out my options, when I spot it: Trevor’s window, cracked open to let the air in. For once, I thank God that he’s a fuckin’ lunatic and likes to drop the temperature of the apartment by keeping his window open all year round. He says the outside air ‘smells better’ and it’s the only way he can sleep.

I cover Ruth’s ear that’s not pressed against my shirt. “Trevor!” I whisper-yell, hoping it’s enough. When I get no answer, I try again, but it’s the same. I’m debating going back to the car and putting Ruth down, even making it halfway back, when I hear it.

“What are you doing?”

I spin, cringing at the scrape of gravel under my boots. “Shut up,” I hiss.

“This would look extremely sketchy if I didn’t know you.”

“Can you buzz me in?”

“I don’t know. I kinda want to watch you roam around the parking lot some more.”

“Come on, man. She’s getting cold.” I nod down at Ruth.

He sobers, darting away from the window. A second later, the buzzer to the building goes off, cutting through the quiet. When I get up the stairs to the apartment door, Trev’s already got it open. He’s leaning against the door jamb with his arms crossed.

“Oh, Homewrecker.” He frowns as he takes in her puffy eyes, swollen from crying.

“I’m gonna get her in bed.”

He nods, stepping back so I can get her in. He moves through the apartment ahead of us, opening doors and pulling back the covers. Once I have her in bed, I pull off her shoes and tuck her in, pausing to drop a lingering kiss on her forehead.

“What happened?” Trevor asks when I get into the kitchen.

I sigh, scratching my shoulder. “She’s gonna stay here for a while.”

“Yeah, no problem.” He leans back against the island. “She gonna be okay?”

I take him in, concern filling his dark eyes as his gaze flits toward the bedroom.

“I’ve got her.”

Chapter Forty-Seven

RUTH

“Holy shit,” I moan as Rowan’s strong fingers dig into my scalp. He massages in the shampoo and I melt in his arms. If it wasn’t for his thigh braced between my legs, keeping me pressed with my front against the shower tile, I’d probably slide down the wall.

“You gotta stop making that noise,” he speaks against my shoulder, his lips slipping over the wet skin.

“I can’t help it.” I let out a particularly explicit sound when his thumbs start down my neck, the muscles going liquid beneath his touch.

“Ruth,” he growls. His hips shift forward, and I realize exactly what’s going on as something long and hot and hard presses against my hip. “We don’t have time for this.”

I gasp as the sensation drives me crazy. “We could make time?” I tease, the feeling of him heating my blood.

---