Page 44 of Teach Me K-Pop

“I have to get back, though.” He looks almost pouty, and it’s so cute I can’t stand it.

I pull my phone out and tap the app to get us a ride to the hotel where they’re staying. “We have about five minutes…”

He doesn’t even give me a chance to finish the sentence before he’s got his hands on the back of my neck, reeling me in to kiss me again.

? ??

Pulling up to the hotel, it’s immediately obvious that the fans have figured out the group is staying here. There’s no way he can get out of this car with me in the back and not cause some sort of major scene. Security guy quickly texts someone as he tells our very confused driver in very abrupt English to circle around the block to the back of the hotel.

Moments later, someone is swinging open an “employees only” gate in a dark section of the street and waving him in. Our third wheel gets out, and I ask the driver to hold on a moment. I still need a ride back to my car at the arena, but I want to tell Nikko good night.

I know I can’t kiss him again with other eyes watching, but I do grab his hand as inconspicuously as I can. “Tonight was amazing.” It’s not sufficient, but I honestly don’t know that I could come up with the right words to tell him how wonderful this has been.

He nods, smiling. “It was perfect. But I knew it would be.”

“Nikko…” I stop even trying to figure out what to say and just smile back.

“Can I see you again tomorrow?” he asks, expectant and hopeful.

“Yes. Of course. Absolutely.”

I watch him disappear through the service entrance with a wave and turn back to the car.

I can’t wait for tomorrow.

?

NIKKO

“Shibal.”

Jase smiles at my cursing, his eyes bright with amusement. I know that he likes that I don’t worry about what I say around him anymore. I no longer feel like I have to be so careful with him; I don’t think about every single thing I want to do or over-analyze the words I want to use.

From the moment we walked into that tiny, dark bar last night and no one looked my way, I had a sense of freedom that I couldn’t remember feeling in so long. I know a little bit of it was being able to move through the world without being noticed, but mostly it was just being by his side. I was practically high off of it by the time I kissed him, caught up in the excitement of having time on my own with the man I wanted so badly to be with.

I had not been able to sleep last night—my body still warm every place Jase had touched me. And now, sitting on his lap in this hidden corner of a hotel rooftop, I have never felt hotter. Both in physical temperature and the way he makes me feel desirable. I can see he wants me how I want him, and it makes me believe I am invincible.

Even as I pulled him through the “do not enter” door to this part of the roof earlier, with Seojun right behind us again to protect us from any prying eyes, I could not have cared less about what Seojun thought. My only concern was finding a place to be as close to Jase as possible and kiss him again.

The other members teased me all day about the dazed look on my face and the way I’ve been spacing out, thinking about Jase’s lips on mine, his hands on me. As soon as I could find a place to push him down, I straddled his thighs and was thrilled with the utter shock in his expression.

I like that I could surprise him. I am surprising myself, too. I had never imagined I could be so forward, but I had also not expected to find someone like this. Like him. That makes me feel these things so strongly. Someone who makes me eager to experience everything with them.

I wish we had more privacy and could go somewhere truly alone, just the two of us. The fact that I have gotten to be with him both last night and tonight is incredible. I had wondered all day if he would come back; if he would be willing to spend more time with me tonight, even with the restrictions and rules. I wanted to think that he would. He has never given me a reason not to trust what he says, but I know the price that comes with trying to be with someone like me is high. Not everyone is willing to pay that.

But he was there as soon as we stepped off stage. Leaning against a wall, all long legs and an easy smile. I ignored the whistles coming from behind me when he scooped me up into a hug and held me tight to his chest, my toes barely still on the floor. Being able to run to him and be swept up in his arms was even better than the rush I get being in front of the fans. I love them so much, but I can already feel, somewhere deep down, that I could love this kind of intimacy more.

Perched on his thighs like this, I can tangle my fingers in his hair the way I’ve always dreamed about while watching him sweep the light strands away from his face as we talk. I think this might be the best thing that has ever happened to me. My one practice kiss, if I can call it that, did not prepare me for anything aboutthis. I hope that I’m not bad at it, but it seems natural to me, to press my mouth to his, to breathe the same air. Every kiss feels like a secret—something I am learning about him, something I am learning about me.

Jase’s blue eyes catch and reflect the moonlight in a way that is mesmerizing to me. He is so opposite to me in so many ways, and I find everything about him fascinating. That he seems to feel the same intrigues me as well. I had an idea of this before yesterday, but I don’t believe I really understood it until I was with him. This pull—like we are magnets—draws me to him and makes me want to be as close as I can to him. But I never have to go far, because he is right there. Like he wants to be near me, too.

I had worried a little last night, as we sat and talked, that maybe Jase did not have the same things in mind that I did. That he might not be as interested in moving forward as I was. Every time I thought I was being obvious, trying to flirt and give him any kind of indication that he was welcome to touch me or kiss me or doanythingto me, he did not take the hint. Or so I thought. I know now that he was waiting on me, being respectful because this is new for me. For us.

But I’ve made it clear, repeatedly, that I want this. Want him and everything he is willing to give me.

Jase bites his lip as he looks at me, his hands slipping down from my waist to cup my ass. He pulls me toward him, eliminating any space left between us. I’m suddenly very aware of all the places I can feel his body against mine and how affected we are by each other, kissing as our hands roam over each other’s bodies.

I’m surprised by the shameless way I begin to instinctually grind my hips, seeking friction. I keep being astounded that I’m figuring out what to do and how to do it without explicit instructions. I’ve always been so afraid of not knowing the right way to kiss or touch someone, but I’m finding that here, with Jase, it is not a problem. We respond to each other like this is what we were made to do. As I move, I can feel him—we are both at least half-hard already. The heat that flashes along my spine with the knowledge that I can do that to him is as overwhelming as the pleasure that immediately follows it.

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