Page 103 of Ink & Ambition

“Oh, that I’m interested in comparing sex with you to sex with someone—” Alex pinches my arm and I swat him away. We both lean on our sides to we’re face-to-face, nose-to-nose. “I love you.”

Alex closes his eyes, softly rubbing the tip of his nose against mine. “Never stop saying that, okay?” He opens his eyes again.

“Okay.”

We lay like this for a while before Alex demands I use the bathroom while he cleans himself up. After a pee and a very quick body shower, I’m curled up in my pajamas with my laptop open to the podcast page.

“Ready to dive in?”

Alex nods, running his towel through his wet hair. Alex had showered after me even though he begged for us to “save water” and shower together. As much as he may wish after this weekend, I’m really not the sexfiendhe thinks I am. Alex slides into the bed next to me, placing a quick kiss on my temple before looking at the laptop screen.

The questions are mostly similar to the ones we always get. Questions about Alex’s sexual experiences. Comments about wanting to hook up with Alex—some of which include phonenumbers. Even questions about me and my sexual escapades.People are disgusting.

We laugh and groan as we scroll until we come across a question that causes us both to pause.

“Are you guys dating?”

Alex looks at me. “Let’s just come out with it. I don’t really understand why we haven’t already told people. Like it needs to be some big secret.”

“It doesn’t need to be a secret but Alex, you and I are treated very differently on this campus. I’m just nervous how this news is going to be received by your…adoring fans.”

Alex sighs. “If anyone actually cared about me, they’d be happy that I’m happy.”

“But that’s just the thing. These people don’t care about you. They care about your social status. They want to be with you for the prestige it comes with. They don’t know the real you.”

Alex blinks. “What do you think the response will be?”

I sigh, pushing the laptop away. “Well, based on the comments I’ve gotten so far, I’m sure people will jump at the chance to call me a gold digger again. Also, they love to say you’re out of my league. Oh, and another good one, I’m just a charity case to you.”

“Why do you even look at these hateful, ridiculous comments anyway?”

“It’s my job.”

“It’s shit,” Alex says, taking the laptop into his lap. He types the question into our script and then types some bullet point responses. When I go to look over his shoulder, he moves the screen away from my view. “No peeking.”

I raised my hands in surrender but I knew I’d look when he wasn’t around. He knew it, too. After a few minutes, Alex closes the computer and takes his phone out, opening to instagram. I watch as he posts a new picture, taking one from the recentalbum in his photos and adds a simple heart emoji as the caption.

After he hits the publish button, my phone vibrates in my pocket. I pull it out to see an instagram notification. Narrowing my eyes, I look at him as I open the app but my eyes widen when I see the photo in full view.

It’s a picture of me at the beach yesterday looking out at the water. You can see my profile and my eyes are closed in bliss. I remember this moment. We had just gotten to the water’s edge and the wind smelled like salt. I wanted to bask in that moment for as long as I could. A slight smile lit up my face. I looked happy.

“You didn’t have to post that.” And tag me in it.

“There’s no reason not to.”

Alex tries to swipe my phone from my hand but I see an unread text from Jessy. She probably just wanted to wish me a happy thanksgiving. Without looking at the message, the phone drops it onto the mattress next to us. Placing a light kiss to my lips, he rests his head against mine. “I don’t want to hide the amazing person you are from the world. Everyone deserves to see you shine.”

My eyes catch him and there’s nothing but genuineness in his expression. This boy. He gives me the confidence to be more than I ever thought possible. Kissing him again, we lose ourselves in the passion of being young and in love. If only the feeling could last forever.

Because Alex whisked us away for a romantic weekend getaway, all the homework I had planned to complete got pushed to the wayside but that didn’t stop me from ensuring that Alex and I wrote our speeches before we left New Jersey. I wrote minein record time but for me, it was easy. I’ve known I wanted to be a journalist ever since I saw a copy of theNew York Times. I always found it so fascinating when people ask the hard hitting questions, the rude and uncouth ones, just to get a story. I wanted to be like that. I wrote my speech about my goal of winning theNew York Timesinternship contest and my aspiration of being a journalist.

When I showed it to Alex, he sang my praises, of course, but I knew he was struggling with his own.

“Just tell them what you told me. That you want to be a personal trainer.”

“That seems like a cop-out,” Alex sighs, closing my laptop. He leans toward me on the bed to try and get me to kiss him but I move out of his reach.

“Uh uh, no distractions until you finish this speech,” I say, pushing the laptop toward him as I move slightly out of his way.

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