Page 108 of Ink & Ambition

“Sunshine?” He answers after the very first ring.

Just the sound of his voice calms my frayed nerves. “Hey, frat boy,” I sigh in contentment. He sighs, too, seemingly relaxed.

“How are you? I’ve been missing you.”

“I miss you, too. Sorry, it’s been a crazy couple of days. I just needed to catch up on some school work.”

I hear the sound of sports slowly fade away in the background until a door shuts and then silence. “And did you? Catch up?”

“Mostly. I’ve still got a few papers to write and finals to study for but I feel okay for now.”

I wonder if Alex is laying on his bed the same way I’m laying on mine. I wonder if I should ask him if he is.

“What have you been up to?” I ask instead, a little intimidated by what his answer to that other question might’ve been.

“Nothing crazy. Working out, caught up on some work myself. Oh and I’ve been talking to Kai. We’re trying to figure out a way to get him back on track, ya know.”

My heart swells. Not only that he’s helping out his friend but that he’s comfortable enough to tell me about it. “That’s great, Alex. I’m really happy to hear that.”

“Yeah, it’s good.” I can hear the smile in his voice. And the sleepiness. I’m sure he can hear it in my voice, too.

“Alex?”

“Yeah, baby?”

“I think if I don’t go to sleep in the next four minutes, I might pass out on the phone.” I laugh but it’s muffled by a yawn, only proving my point. My eyes start to shutter closed but I force them to stay open. I don’t want to miss this time with him but the exhaustion of the last few days has finally hit me all at once.

Alex laughs. “That’s okay, sunshine. You sleep. I’ll be here when you wake up.”

My eyebrows perk up. “You will?”

“If you want me to.”

I nod, sleepily, even though I know he can’t see me. “I love you, frat boy.”

“I love you too, sunshine.” The last thing I hear is Alex hummingDream a Little Dream of Me.

“Are you ready for another question, Alex?” I ask, pulling up my notecards. Alex and I had started the recording session the same way as all our previous ones, with our signature greeting and Alex’s embarrassing antics that always make me blush.

I still can’t believe that this is our last episode ever. Once I submit this to theNew York Times, we’ll have no reason to continue on. We aren’t letting the viewers know that though, still wanting them to view and comment on the videos. It also takes some of the pressure off of having to record a “grand finale.”If the audience doesn't know it’s ending, there’s no need to do anything extra for the final episode.

“I’m ready, Margot.” Alex winks at me this time instead of the camera and a warmth spreads through me. This incredible man loves me. And I love him.

“Sam K wants to know what she should do if her family doesn’t approve of her boyfriend.” It was a question we debated answering but ultimately decided it was important enough to try and tackle. Most of the questions we receive are silly or flirty but through the cracks there are some real, meaningful problems that are asking for sincere solutions.

Alex glances down at his notes but I know he already knows what he wants to say. “That’s a tricky one, Sam, I’m not gonna lie to you. It’s difficult on multiple levels. Do you take your family’s side and leave the relationship or do you stay with the person and risk losing your family? I wish I had the answers, Sam but not every situation can be judged in a vacuum.”

Alex sighs before continuing. “I feel like this probably isn’t advice you get often but, Sam, in this case, I think you need to be selfish. I think you need to put yourself first and think, if you absolutely had to choose, which choice would makeyouhappiest.

“Who supports you more? Who helps you flourish? And who will be there for you in your darkest times? That’s the person I would pick.” Alex really has a way with words and I don’t know if I’ll ever get used to how eloquent he can be.

“I completely agree.” I wonder if his words are penetrating his own mind or if he’s just thinking about this faceless viewer. While his father isn’t giving him an ultimatum to choose between him or me, he is forcing him to do something that he doesn’t necessarily want to do. Alex should take his own advice and be selfish.

I pose another question from a viewer about pooping at a friend-with-benefits’ apartment and Alex takes off running with his advice. His smile is breathtaking as he makes a joke. His perfect smile reminds me of how his teeth grazed my inner thigh. How his hot breath coasted up my leg toward that very sensitive part–

“Right, sunshine?”

“Huh?”

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