Page 119 of Ink & Ambition

“But that place is so scary.”

I laugh, placing the dishes in the sink and start to wash them. “I’ll be okay.”

“Yeah, Memaw, Margot can handle herself out there. I raised her tough like that.” Arden grabs the wet dishes from the drying rack and starts to dry and put them away. We work in tandem, Memaw sitting at the kitchen island behind us.

“Just don’t go out at night. And don’t get on those dirty trains they have there and don’t–”

“Memaw, it’s going to be alright,” I say with a huff. “I’m only there for two weeks and I’ll be staying near theNew York Timesbuilding so that’s probably a nice area.”

Memaw shrugs. “Nothing about that city is nice,” she mutters under her breath.

Arden rolls his eyes and hits my hip with his. “Imagine the day when Margot lives there and we have to go visit her.”

“I ain’t never going up to that loud place,” Memaw says, slowly standing from her dining room seat to go and settle in for the night on her living room arm chair. “They got newspapers in South Carolina, you know,” she shouts as she goes.

“Just as prestigious, I’m sure,” Arden says in my ear and I hold in my giggle. We keep working in silence as the dishes dwindle down. After a few moments, Arden speaks up.

“So, you’ve been home for a week now. Are we going to talk about the Alex thing or what?

I close my mouth for a moment. Maybe I should just play dumb. “What Alex thing?”

“Mars,” Arden says, seriously. The tone of his voice causes me to look in his eyes. Can’t play dumb with the one person who knows me better than anyone else. “Let’s talk.”

Arden gestures toward the now empty kitchen table and we sit in the same seats we just sat at for dinner. “The last episode of the podcast featured you two lovebirds making googly eyes at each other and now you haven’t mentioned him, haven’t talked to him once since you’ve been home. What gives?”

“It’s nothing.”

Arden rolls his eyes. “It’s not nothing. I met the guy. Anyone with eyes could see you were crazy about each other. He didn’t hurt you, did he? Cause I’ll—”

“He didn’t hurt me. Not physically anyway. I just…we decided we weren’t right for each other, that’s all.”

“Wedecided?”

All I can do is nod.

“But why, Mars?”

I want to tell Arden about everything but, knowing him, he’d just see a boy hurting his little sister and there wouldn’t be much stopping him from going up to his house and taking matters intohis own hands. I can’t have that. I need to control the situation like I’ve been doing. I need to keep my calm and just tell Arden to mind his own business.

“We just weren’t going to work in the long run. I need to think about my future and I don’t think he fits into it.”

Arden quietly narrows his eyes at me. He knows I’m lying but he seems to be choosing not to press me on it. I appreciate him for that. More than he knows.

I need out of this conversation before I start sobbing.

“Gotta go finish packing,” I say, hitting my palms on the table and standing up.

Arden nods but doesn’t follow suit. “I’m here for you. You know that, right?”

“Of course I know that.”

As I walk by, I grab his shoulder, pulling his face down so I can plant a kiss on his cheek. I wish I could tell him everything but this is one battle that I need to fight on my own.

Memaw was right about one thing. New York is loud. And busy. And hectic. But it’s also brilliant, electric, and exciting. Everything about this place buzzes with importance and prestige. If I am able to live here one day, I will never shut up about it.

TheNew York Timesbuilding is smack in the center of Times Square and every time I step out of my hotel to walk to the office, I am faced with another incredible thing about this city. From the billboards to the people to the atmosphere. There’s even still some confetti on the floor from the New Year's Eve celebration the weekend before.

It’s only been three days and I’ve already learned that you must walk on the right and you must walk fast.

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