Page 7 of Leland

“What's going to be a lot of work, Little one?”

“Topping me,” she answered, “and I’m not a Little.”

Chuckling, I patted her back. “All dynamics are a lot of work, but it’s something we work for because we want it.” I ignored her comment about not being a Little.

“Yeah. I-I do need help, though.”

We sat in silence for several long moments. Each second that ticked by felt like an hour. I wished I could better gauge how she was feeling or tell what she was thinking.

“We can try, okay? But I can’t promise anything. I’m really messed up.”

“Oh, honey. You’re not messed up. You just have some issues you’re working through, but we all do. We are all working on personal goals; that’s life, babygirl.”

She nodded, but it felt forced. She’d learn soon enough, though.

“Where do we start?”

“Well, first I want you to go home for the weekend and think about it. Talk my offer out with your friends, with Blade, whoever you need to be a sounding board. I’m going to email you a list of people you can call that can give you a reference of my character or answer any questions you have about me asa Dominant. I also want you to write down any questions or thoughts you have. Sunday we will meet atThe Baker’s Dozento go over them. You can give me your official answer then.”

“Those are good things to do,” she responded, almost sounding like she was relieved.

“Were you worried we would just jump right in?” I asked, jokingly.

Her silence answered for her.

“Oh, baby,” I soothed. “I’m sorry you were worried. I really planned this much better in my head. I just got nervous and well, I kinda blew it.”

Looking up, she studied me for a minute. “Why are you nervous? It can’t be because you want to help me that badly. This is my problem, not yours.”

Her words just deepened my sympathy for her. She had been through so much. “It’s not just your problem, Rouge. You have so many people that love you and when you love someone, you help them carry their problems.”

She struggled a bit in my arms and I let her go. She quickly stood to her feet and took several steps away from me.

“I don’t have anyone that loves me. Well, except Emily.” The look of hurt and the vulnerability in her eyes was genuine. She really didn’t understand how loved she was.

“Oh, silly girl,” I scolded, shaking my head. “You have so many people who are cheering for you in life. Why do you think Blade, Kay, Smoke, and Bash worry about you so much? Because they care.”

“No, I’m just a… a coworker. They don’t... I think...” She struggled.

“Blade is your play partner at the club because he wants to give you what you need while keeping you safe. Smoke drives fifteen minutes past the shop to pick you up on rainy days. Kay is always bitching about how little you eat and then orders pizza becauseshe knows it will appeal to you. Bash... fucking Bash checks into the credentials of everyone you interact with. Your therapist, your doctor, and that damn oral surgeon that tried to convince you that you needed veneers.”

Her eyes were wide as the implications of what I had explained finally hit home.

“You’re so loved, sugar.”

Chapter Three

Rouge

I stood outside of Kay’s office, wringing my hands together. Leland was off to the side; his strong presence was a tiny bit encouraging and a lot intimidating. Swallowing, I lifted my shaking hand and knocked on her door.

“Come in,” her tight voice answered.You made her feel that way with your temper. Why couldn’t you just let it go?

Looking back at Leland, I waited until he nodded before going inside.

Kay was sitting at her desk, resting her head in her hands. She looked up after a few moments of me dancing foot to foot in front of her. Her eyes were red-rimmed and I physically felt sick. I deserved it.

“I’m so sorry,” I said sincerely.

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