Page 6 of The Closed Off Captain

“Oh boy,” she says as she settles in her favorite chair. “Youdofeel guilty if you made my favorite dish.”

“I didn’t feel guilty; I wanted to make this.”

She snorts and mumbles something I can’t hear. After getting a bowl out of her cabinet, I dish her up a portion and carry it to where she’s sitting. The news on the tv plays quietly in the background, but I ignore it. Hopefully, she will too or she’ll dive into something political, and that will be the end of our peace. “How is it?” I ask.

“It’s fine.” I smile to myself because that’s as good a compliment as I’ll ever receive. She takes another bite and then narrows her eyes on me. “Why aren’t you eating?”

“I’m taking a break from wheat right now.”

“Is your stomach still bothering you?”

“I’m fine.”

She puts her bowl down. “When are you going to the doctor?”

I resist the urge to sigh. I don’t have time for a doctor’s appointment. “I’ll go soon.”

“See that you do. So how are your boys doing?”

I’ve given up correcting her on the fact that the Green Thunder guys are not “my guys.” Now, I just go with it. “Good. They won their first six games, so we’re off to a good start.”

“I watched the last one. That goalie better shape up, or he’ll be losing his spot on the team. It’s probably because he’s a new dad; he’s distracted.”

“Grandma, Rico’s been a dad for several months now, and he’s in no danger of losing his spot on the team.” I would know.

“Well, he is if he keeps letting the other team score like that.”

“Grandma May, it was one goal; and we scored three on them.”

“Still. He’s slipping, I say. And what about Big C? He didn’t seem to play so good. He didn’t score any goals.”

I’ve given up on trying to get her not to call Gunner Big C, named after the C on his jersey for Captain. “I think he played just fine,” I defend him.

“Of course you do; you’re in love with him.”

I don’t bother correcting her. It’s an argument we’ve had at least a hundred times. I told her about Gunner before I even joined the Green Thunder organization. And then I made it a thousand times worse telling her that I was going to ask him out. That feels like a lifetime ago, but she won’t let it go. It’s no use arguing with her. Grandma May is the most stubborn person I know. Besides, the more I try to refute it, the more she thinks I’m just in denial. So, it’s best to just let it be. I've learned that the hard way. “Is Big C married yet?”

I sigh. “No, Grandma May. Just like he hasn’t been the four hundred eighty times you’ve asked me before.”

“Then there’s still hope.”

I don’t respond as I pick up her bowl and wash it in the sink. “You want a brownie? I brought your favorite.”

“The ones with cream cheese?” she asks, as if there’s any other kind I grab for her.

I bring her one on a plate and grab her box of Five Crowns and start shuffling the cards. We play every time I come over, and she usually wins. The afternoon sun begins to set, and I switch the tv over to the hockey game that’s playing. We chat about nothing and everything for the duration of the game. “What’s wrong?” she asks after the fifth round of our card game.

I meet her shrewd gaze. “Nothing.”

“Oh pshaw. There’s something bothering you; you aren’t focused on anything. You just keep staring out into space and letting me smoke you.”

“First of all, you always smoke me; so that’s nothing new. Second, there’s nothing wrong. My mind’s just busy.”

She snorts. “Your mind’s always busy.” I smile at her words because we both know it’s true; it’s always been that way.

“Nothing’s changed since you were a young'un and couldn’t go to sleep at night.”

“I remember.” I shuffle the deck and count out six cards for each of us. Some nights, it feels like I’m still the little girl that can’t get her mind to settle at night so she can sleep. My mind’s always going.Always.It’s one of the hazards of my job; I’ve gotten used to it over the last four years.

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