Page 18 of Heal Me

But the images can only keep me from reality for so long. Tears start pressing behind my eyes at the thought of the only two people I ever truly loved—the ones who were cruelly ripped away from me. My tears are the one thing I won’t let Zoltan have. It’s the only part of my dignity I can save.

So I drift back to the present. The stabbing thrusts in my pelvis, the devil hiding behind a charming smile, and the searing pain in the cuts on my stomach. I bite down on my jaw and muster all my will. Because I won’t cry for him.

But Zoltan is not done trying as he comes inside me and pulls out. He wantseverything,and he’s determined to take my tears.

As if reading my thoughts, he says, “Stubborn bitch. You really think you can keep those tears from me?”

I don’t give him an answer. I don’t react until he moves the blade back to my torso—to my ribs.

“Let’s see if the blade slicing across bone will do the trick.” He gives me a cruel smile, eyes widening with sadistic insanity, nostrils flaring with beastly lust.

“Don’t,” I say in a hoarse voice as I stare up at him. “Zoltan, please don’t.”

“That’s right, beg me, bitch. And then cry.” He drags the knife across my skin, digging deep, slicing across my raw bones.

Agony unlike any I’ve ever known screeches in my nerves, flaying my mind and crushing me into pieces. Nails on a chalkboard, a fork on a plate. The pain even seems toringin my ears. It closes up my throat, snuffing shut my voice and my lungs.

For a moment, I just lie there, frozen into place, mouth slightly ajar as I stare emptily at the ceiling.

“Cry,” he demands.

Finally, I manage a word. “Stop,” I choke out in a hoarse voice. If he keeps going like this, I won’t be able to sing tomorrow—before all those people he has gathered to make me into a star.

“Then cry,” he snarls, moving the knife to the next rib and slicing through my flesh.

The pain explodes—in my mind, my body, and my every sense. It cuts through everything I am and was. My hopes, my dreams, and the final scraps of worth I’ve been clinging to. That final cut makes everything clear, just before it steals my consciousness and thrusts me into pitch-black blissful darkness.

***

I wake up drenched in cold sweat, my heart pounding like it’s about to give in.

A deep pain aches in my body, but I can’t tell if it’s real or a memory.

I open my eyes but don’t see anything. For a moment, I think this is it.Zoltan killed me.

But then I inspect my surroundings with my hands—the foam mattress, the rough blankets, and the padded walls.

I’m not with Zoltan.

Or maybe I am?

Maybe he’s lurking in the deep shadows, ready to jump?

Steps echo through the hall outside my cell. Maybe that’s him, finally having found me and bribed his way in?

Or maybe he’s been here all along, having paid someone to lock me up in here, taking his time to torment me before he pounces himself?

Or maybe he has brought me out of that facility, locked me in some new padded cell he has made for me at his estate.

There’s no way to tell.

My mind spirals out of control, paranoid and wild.

I push up to sit, staring into the darkness, searching for some kind of reassurance. There’s none to find.

My heart beats faster and faster. My airways narrow as the darkness closes tight around me. I feel like I’m choking.

“Please,” I wheeze, pressing my hands to my tight chest. “Is anyone there?” I move to crawl across the floor, trying to raise my voice as I go. “Help me. Please, I can’t breathe.” I can’t muster much strength between my heaving breaths, so I take to knocking at the door instead. Tiny slaps at the padding turn to pounding fists as my desperation rises.

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