Page 125 of First Chance

“Am not.” I side-eye her, grabbing the blanket to cover her up. She curls further into my side and sighs happily.

“Are you sure you don’t want some ice cream?” She holds the spoon up until I shake my head, and then pops it into her mouth.

“Actually.” I grab her chin. “Give me a taste.”

My mouth claims hers, swiping my tongue through her lips and tasting the sweetness on hers. I had no interest in the ice cream, not when she tastes better than any dessert on this planet.

Her surprise turns hungry, and the kiss intensifies until my body is slowly pulled to cover hers. She barely manages to find the coffee table with her bowl before wrapping bothhands around the back of my neck and dragging me the rest of the way down.

Her cold fingers dig into my skin as I nibble softly on her neck, my hands lifting her hoodie up from the bottom to take her full breasts in my palms. I flick her tightened peaks with my thumbs, drawing her moans out.

“What are you doing?” She asks as I snag her spoon from the table, dripping the melted vanilla on her sexy tits.

“I told you I wanted a taste.” My tongue laps up every bit, slowly and methodically, cleaning her skin off with precision. The special attention I pay to her nipples makes her writhe against me, and I keep torturing her. I suck on her sensitive points until she’s grinding uncontrollably against my rib cage, seeking the relief she really wants.

“Please, Lochlan, I know you don’t want to fuck me but I’m begging you. I’ve done the other stuff, and I’ve done so well. Don’t I deserve your cock inside of me? Please,” she begs, while grenades detonate against all of my self-control and willpower, attempting to destroy my integrity.

“Fuck, baby, don’t say that,” I mutter against her chest, kissing the spot over her heart. “You deserve everything in this world. Everything.”

“Then why won’t you do what I want?”

“Because it’s not supposed to be like this.”

She grabs my face in her hands and looks at me tenderly. “Like what? With a man that I want? Or a man whose ring I’m wearing?”

“That’s not fair.”

“Why? I forced this engagement on you, but I didn’t force you to treat me the way that you do. You aren’t faking the way you touch me, or the way that you look at me. You aren’tlying when you speak to me more lovingly than anyone in my entire life has.”

“This engagement is fake, and it has to be because if I make love to you the way I want to, then I’ll never let you leave, Jo. Don’t you get it? If you let me love you for real, then I’ll die when you leave me. Because youhaveto leave. You can’t stay here forever. Not when you have your entire life to live out there.”

“Lochlan…”

“I’m sorry, this was a mistake.” I push off of her, stumbling out of the house before she can get another word in because she sways me too easily with them.

I don’t want her to see how truly and deeply in love I already am because I can never tell her, and I don’t want her pity.

My fists hit the porch railing, and I grip it roughly, shaking the old wood until the whole partition rattles.

“FUCK!” I yell at the universe. It’s such a sick twist of fate to put her in front of me, make me want her, and be forced to push her away.

I can’t be the reason she stays.

A red SUV pulls through the wide open entrance, and a groan of aggravation rumbles inside my chest. Is there a sign that says we want visitors at the bottom of the mountain?

“Why are you out here looking all broody and sad?” Becky asks as she steps out of her car with Emory.

“This is how I normally look.”

“True, my mistake.” She hands Emory a bag, and she skips up the porch steps to hand it to me.

“I brought my fairy dress. Do you think Jo will play dress up with me?” She looks up at me so innocently, and my heart breaks all over again, knowing that Jo will leave Emorybehind when she goes, too.

“Oh, uh.”

“I would love to, Em,” Jo says from the doorway. She doesn’t look at me. “Let me go grab some stuff from my room.”

She hurries down the porch steps to the guesthouse with her arms crossed over her chest because she isn’t wearing a bra.

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