Page 64 of First Chance

Our eyes connect as my hands clasp the top of his shoulders and his envelop my ribs. I take a step off the stage, trusting him to catch me, but I don’t come close to falling.

My shoe meets the floor gracefully as if there wasn’t any distance between my steps at all.

The warmth of his hands slips from my sides as he turns to walk back toward the banquet tables, quickly cutting off our connection. He’s clearing a path for me while simultaneously continuing the silent treatment from before.

Everyone moves out of his way like a school of fish sensing a shark. No one looks in my direction or waves me over for conversation. Nobody is trying to get anything from me because they’re afraid to approach me.

I’m not invisible when I’m with Lochlan, not like I am to my parents, but I’m safeguarded.

I’m free.

I grab his forearm from behind before we reach the large round table, where I see everyone else is sitting. “Thank you for the rescue,” I say as he turns his attention to me.

His eyes go to my hand on his forearm first and then to the crowd around us before landing on my face, but he looks anguished.

“The quicker we get the funds we need from the events, the quicker I can get my cameras and stop pretending to be someone I’m not.”

“What?” My heart sinks in my chest.

“I don’t belong here, Jo. Just like you don’t belong at the sanctuary.” My hand falls from his arm, and he turns away, walking away from me again like he did a couple of nights ago.

Everything feels heavy. My skin, my bones. I want to slump to the floor and forget the facade I always put on.

I’m so tired of not being good enough, but it doesn’t matter because I have to continue on. I have to be the perfect daughter in a room full of people who don’t know the faintest detail about me. I have to pretend to be a good sister.

I have to mingle and market Second Chance Sanctuary to people even though I’m being shoved out of the gates like an unwanted stray.

“Are you out of your mind, JoAnna?” My mother’s voice attacks me from behind. “Being lifted off the stage. Sitting onthatman’s lap. It’s despicable.”

“I don’t want to talk about this right now, Mom.”

“Randall Porter told your brother about him. You’re trolliping around with arapist?” She spits the word at me.

“He’s not. Daddy exonerated him.”

“Your daddy will pick up a hooker off a turnpike. He has no critical thinking skills, clearly.”

“Lochlan is a good man, but he’s just my boss.”

She scoffs and rolls her eyes. “Your boss. You’re wasting everyone’s time. Come back home, or we’ll pull your school admission.”

“Dad promised.”

“I don’t care what your daddy promised.”

“If you don’t let me get through school, I’ll tell everyone about what Dad and Conrad did.”

She recoils. How dare I put her precious family in the way of scandal?

“I wish you were never born,” she sneers, stomping away.

I’m motionless while her nasty words sink in. Slowly letting the deep void in my heart overtake me.

Everything is too tight.

I can’t breathe.

The crowd disappears as I snake my way through people without seeing them, desperate for an escape. I’m clawing at the neckline of my dress before I reach a long, dark hallway, pulling at it desperately for some relief.