Page 144 of Lovers' Dance

Maybe I should’ve kept my stupid mouth shut. Or thanked Mrs Vanderbilt for her ‘kind’ words. I sighed in resignation. I was being an ass and taking it out on Matt. Didn’t I decide tonight I wasn’t going to let anything mess up our relationship?

“I’m sorry, Matt.” This time I was genuine.

Matt unfolded his arms and rubbed his temple with one hand. “Don’t apologize, poppet.” He let out a resigned sigh himself, and we peered uncertainly at each other. I tried to win this stare-off, but those penetrating grey eyes of his totally defeated me. I looked away, consoling myself that he’d perfected his staring talents in the boardroom and he was a Bradley, whatever that entailed.

“Your explanation does have some merit,” he said quietly.

“Some?” I mean, it had more thansomemerit. My explanation was clear, concise. My explanation was loaded with merit.

Matt eyed my stance. So I had a little attitude going on, but he had to admit I was making perfect sense.

“I think—” He paused, then rubbed a hand over his face. “Look, we need to have a proper discussion about these things, poppet.”

I opened my mouth and he held a hand up, silencing me. Was I trained?

“Now isn’t the time,” he continued softly. “But it’s obvious we need to address certain contentious issues that unfortunately are unavoidable. We can’t change who we are, and unless we figure out a way to deal with certain issues—”

“You mean race?” I asked. Why was he loathe to say it?

Matt cocked his head at me. “Can I continue without further interruptions?”

I nodded.

“Good. Now where was I?”

“We can’t change who we are and we need to figure this out or else,” I summarized with private alarm. I was so concerned with looking at this whole relationship from my point-of-view, it hadn’t crossed my mind that maybe Matt might be the one to say, “To hell with this drama.”

“Or else this won’t work, poppet,” he said, verbally confirming what I feared.

“Ah.” I licked my dry lips. “You’re not going to, um, I mean, you do love me, right?”

His forehead furrowed as he frowned at me. “Sometimes I forget how much younger than me you are and the fact this is your first relationship.” Matt closed the distance between us and fingered my chin, tilting my head up so I could see into his eyes. “I adore you and I don’t know how else to reassure you, poppet.”

“Maybe a tattoo of my name somewhere on your body?” My attempt to lighten the tension between us made a little headway. He gave me the ghost of a smile.

“Not in a million years,” Matt replied dryly, then resumed his serious demeanour. “We have to get past this. Okay?”

I nodded slowly, then forced a smile to my face. “Okay, Matt.”

He kissed the tip of my nose, then stepped back, taking my hand in his.

“This is going to sound strange,” I said as Matt and I started moving back towards the festivities. “But I miss when no one knew about us. Those were good times. It was just us in our own little world.”

“Mmm.” Matt made a non-committal sound at the back of his throat.

“It was nice, wasn’t it?” I squeezed his hand, marvelling at how small mine was to his. I frigging loved his hands, so strong, yet they could be so gentle. “Don’t you miss it?”

Matt stopped for a second, shaking his head slightly. “I miss spending the time with you. Right now, it seems like we’re both too busy. I don’t miss the hiding. The secrecy. I despise secrets, poppet, they always get found out.”

I fell silent as we dodged the other guests and approached Nathan and Bella.

I had a secret. I glanced surreptitiously at Matt from under my lashes. Was that a loaded comment intended for me? Paranoia, it was understandable. He was good at reading me. Hmm, maybe I should sign up for acting classes. Learn to project emotion that you didn’t feel.

“Matt.” Bella handed me my flute while smiling at Matt. “Nathan’s volunteered you both for Franklin’s yearly skiing and mountain climb in Switzerland.”

“You what?” Matt dropped my hand, glaring at a grinning Nathan.

“We missed out last year, Matt,” Nathan said unrepentantly.

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