Page 21 of Deadly Little Hearts

“Probably,” I say with a grin.

I’ve watched Gage with Amirah, how protective he is with her, and how much it confused me over the years.The Gage I knew was an arrogant asshole, and I used to think, how could he be like that with her when he didn’t protect me?When he walked away and let us go?

“Why didn’t you protect me?”The words fall out of my mouth, and Gage’s body tenses against mine.

He pulls back.His fingers rest under my chin, and he lifts my head up until his green eyes clash with mine.“That’s the one regret I’ve lived with my entire life.”His throat bobs, his eyes glassing over.“Not protecting you from him.”

I nod, licking my wet lips.Nothing he says will make up for the heartbreak I felt back then, and there will always be part of me that can’t fully trust he won’t do it again.That he won’t walk away from me and leave me unprotected—but I don’t need any man to protect me anymore.I have myself, and that’s enough.

“I’ll spend every second of every day protecting you from anyone who dares to fuck with what’s mine,” he growls, and my stomach twists.

I want to believe him, but I’m afraid to be disappointed when he doesn’t keep his promise.Words don’t mean shit; actions do.

I duck out from under his arm, and he lets me go.

“I mean it, Freya,” he says, and I nod, unable to form the right words.If I open my mouth now, nothing will make sense.

When Gage opens up and brings you into his heart, when he claims you as his, there’s nothing he wouldn’t do for you, and I know that’s how he feels about me.

Still, I haven’t given him, Hazen, and Lucas my whole heart, and I don’t know if I ever can.

Chapter 11

Freya

Myfingersslidearoundthe warm mug of coffee, my eyes heavy from sleep as I sink down into the couch in our small trailer the next day.

A slight frown creases my mother’s brow as she moves around our small kitchen.“What time did you get home?”

“Late.”I yawn, rubbing the sleep from my eyes.

“I don’t understand why you’re hanging around The Brotherhood.”

I groan.“Mom, we talked about this yesterday.”

“And you apparently didn’t listen.They aren’t good people, Freya.You know what they did to us.I don’t want you going over there anymore.”My mother squeezes the maple syrup onto my pancakes.

It’s too early for this shit.“I’m a grown-ass woman.I’m not getting told what to do with my life,” I snap.

“I’ve already lost one kid to The Brotherhood.”Her voice cracks.“I’m not going to lose another.”

It feels like she’s reaching into my chest and squeezing my heart until it explodes into a million pieces.But even though she’s in pain, so am I.I lost a brother, but the number of times I’ve almost lost her as well is far too high.She’s clean now, but how many times have I had to pick up the pieces for her?And who knows how long this new sobriety will last?

“You lost Alec long before that, and you know it,” I say, and her face falls.

“Why do you keep punishing me?”she says, defeated.“I’m trying, Freya, I really am.”She passes me a plate.

“I know you are, but that doesn’t change everything you’ve put us through.It doesn’t take it all away.”I pause.I would hate for our fight to be the cause of a relapse.“But I am proud of you, Mom.What you’re doing ...it’s really impressive.”

“Thank you.”Mom brings her mug to her lips and takes a long sip.“I wish I could go back to that day and never touch that shit.”

“How did it start?”I ask the one question that’s been playing on my mind since that night.I heard Nadine’s story, but I want the truth from my mother’s mouth.

“Fuck, Freya, do you really want to know?”Her grip around her mug tightens, and maybe I shouldn’t have asked her.

I shouldn’t push her, but instead of saying no, I nod.

“My memories from back then are a little hazy, but I’ll try.”She takes her mug and sits down on the couch.I leave my pancakes and join her, my knee brushing against hers.

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