Page 63 of Deadly Little Hearts

I lean back into Lucas’s chest, resting my ear against his beating heart.He’s right, but I still feel responsible for my mother.Especially since Alec isn’t here.She has no one to look out for her anymore.I’ll never forgive her for what she’s done to me, to us, but I still have to help her.

“I just need to make sure she’s okay,” I say.

“I get it.”

We reach the crossroads a couple hundred yards from the security point that’s now a pile of ash.It’s too risky crossing there.The Daringhood crew have people patrolling on their side, and we do on ours.They will see us the second we step out of the shadows.I just want to get this over with quickly and come back again.Battle lines have been drawn, and I’m not sure we’ll come out alive.

We’re close to the fence where I found my brother, and I don’t dare look to my right, afraid I’ll see him again.The picture of him hanging from the fence is still clear as day in my mind, something I wish would go away.

I move out of Lucas’s embrace as we reach a little deserted outpost.This is where I used to sneak over, when Amirah would wait for me on this side of the tracks.On the other side, there’s no one in sight, which surprises me, but it doesn’t mean that no one is watching from the shadows.Kai isn’t stupid.He may not have as much financial support as The Brotherhood, but people in Daringhood don’t play games.They get the job done, quick and fast, guerilla warfare style.

“Let’s go,” I say, stepping over the first track.

Lucas grabs my arm.“Fuck this.Maybe we shouldn’t without the guys.”

I yank my arm out of his, stepping over the tracks toward the fence.“I didn’t ask you to come,” I say over my shoulder, before breaking into a run.Lucas curses from behind me, then the crunch of his shoes follows me.

I keep running through the field, the grass brushing against my ankles.The cool early morning air pushes my hair out of my face.Lucas pants from somewhere in the distance.He curses and I laugh.We could stop now that we are far away from the crossing, but hearing Lucas struggling is too good.

“Fuck, Freya, stop.I hate running.”He groans, and I slow down once we hit the small fence.

Grabbing on to the barbed wire, I kick my leg over and jump, then land on the soft grass on the other side.Lucas trails closely behind me.

I stop at the dirt road, and a wave of sadness slams into me like a freight train, almost bringing me to my knees.Last time I was here, I was with Alec.It feels like a lifetime ago and like yesterday at the same time.When he drove me down this road, we talked about his new girlfriend, Mia.He warned me not to go over the tracks, but told me he still loved me unconditionally.

I’d do anything to bring him back, to have him here for one more day.To hear him laugh, curse me out, and tell me about his plans for college.If Nadine hadn’t interfered, he would have made it there, succeeded in doing what he loved.Spread his wings without anything holding him back.

Arms wrap around me from behind, and I lean back into Lucas’s embrace.“You okay?”he asks, and I wipe away my tears with my sleeve.

“This is where Alec used to drop me when I’d sneak over the tracks.Just remembering the last time we did.”

“I wish I knew him better and found out he was my half-brother before it was too late,” Lucas says, and a heaviness falls on my heart.

“You would have loved him.”

“Tell me about him?”Lucas asks, moving beside me and taking my hand in his.

We start walking down the road, and I tell Lucas everything I loved about my brother.I, too, wish we were aware of our mother’s affair earlier.Things might have been different.Maybe Alec would still be here with us.

Before I know it, we’re in front of the trailer.

“You ready?”Lucas asks, and I shake my head.I vowed to never see her again after the last time, but fate had other plans.

The front door opens, and my mother stumbles out, her eyes as wild as her hair.Her skimpy dress flips up in the wind, but she doesn’t bother pushing it back down.

“Oh, thank fuck.Where the fuck have you been?”she yells, folding her arms over her chest.

“I told you I was leaving.”

She laughs.“I’ve heard that a million times before, but you never go far or for this long.I needed you.”

“What do you want?”

She finally notices Lucas next to me and frowns.“Who’s this?”

“I’m—”

I throw up my hand, stopping him.“It doesn’t matter who he is.I’m here now.What do you want?”I snap.I’m about ready to walk back.She’s seen him before; she’s either out of her mind or doesn’t remember.

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