Page 62 of Her Lawless Prince

When they were alone, she hurried toward him. “Are you harmed?”

“The drugs are wearing off, and my head is clearing.” He seemed upset. She could hardly blame him.

“Drugs?” Payton stopped near the couch. “I’m sorry about my brother. He thought he was protecting me. He locked me in a room on the spaceship. I didn’t know what was happening to you.”

“He doesn’t think I’m worthy of you.” Nyle ran his hands through his hair. “He’s right. We weren’t thinking clearly. Maybe the danger of being kidnapped in space brought us together.”

“What?” Payton shook her head. “No.”

“You’re a princess. I’m…” He gave a weak shrug. “I’m—”

“Don’t finish that sentence. Whatever it is you were about to say, don’t.” Payton lifted her hands.

“I met your father.” Nyle crossed his arms over his chest, as if trying to keep himself rigid and unwelcoming. “He seems like an honorable man. Terrifying but honorable.”

“He stared at you without speaking, didn’t he?” Payton tried to close the distance between them, but he stepped away every time she stepped forward. “I hate when he does that. He knows people have this need to fill the silence. So he just intimidates and sees what falls out. What did you tell him?”

“The truth.”

Payton bit her lip. “Everything?”

“Nothing that would dishonor you.”

Payton stared at him, willing him to smile. She hated the sadness in his gaze. She hated this situation.

She wished he would ask her to run away with him into the forest, into the sky, into the bed, anywhere that they could be together.

It couldn’t be.

She’d promised her father she wouldn’t hide in the forest, not with the Federation looming.

The high skies were an awful place without air, and her soul would wither trapped in the deep black.

And the guards would hear them in the bed.

Payton wasn’t ashamed to have him as a lover, but she would be ashamed to dishonor her family by letting it be known she had a half mateanda lover. No, not just her family. She would dishonor herself. She would become something she resented. She would become like her grandfather and the Myrddinians, making a mockery of what was most sacred—love.

Everything they had in life, all the power, the wars, the very castle around them, the forest. In the end, it meant nothing if you didn’t respect the one thing that mattered most.

Love.

A tear slipped down her cheek. “I’m sorry, Nyle.”

He finally came closer, lifting his hand. “Don’t. You have no reason to be sorry. You have done nothing wrong.”

Payton forced herself to keep their distance. If he touched her, she wouldn’t be able to let go.

“I don’t expect you to understand this, but I betrayed you before I knew you.” Payton lifted her hand to keep him from advancing.

“You’re right. I don’t understand why you would say that. It’s not true.”

“I didn’t believe in you. I didn’t believe that I would find you. I didn’t want to find you. Part of me thought that I was beyond needing to be defined by love. So I threw our chance away.” She lowered her voice. The guards were trained not to listen, but who could really know for sure? “I married Yevgen, and I think the gods are going to punish me for it.”

“Oh, Payton. No.” He closed his eyes and wiped at a tear with the back of his hand before it could fall. He shook his head. “You didn’t ruin anything. You didn’t throw anything away.”

She inhaled sharply and pressed her hand to his chest. The pain rolling over her should have killed her. “You don’t want me.”

“That’s not what I said.” He opened his eyes and stared into hers. “You didn’t ruin anything because we never had a chance. Maybe you innately knew the truth. Maybe Yevgen is the only way any part of me could be with you. He’ll do everything in his power to protect you.”

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