Page 46 of Nearly Dead

Pressure against my shoulder makes me aware of Zephronis’ touch.I fall back into my body like a kite being yanked from the sky.

ChapterEleven

I find myself back in the library.Tears wet my cheeks.I didn’t realize I had been crying.Lorelai’s eyes mirror my own, haunted by the memory she just shared.

“I’m so sorry,” she whispers, her voice breaking.

She still holds my hand, only now she’s clutching it hard like she’s scared to let go.The hybrid monster inside of me doesn’t like the emotions pouring through.It’s hard to remain calm when I feel like I was just attacked.

“Take a breath,” Zephronis says, removing his hands from our shoulders.

Lorelai appears as if she wants to hug me, but I give a slight shake of my head and pull my hand away.Her heart is hammering in her chest, and it’s taking everything in me not to reach for it to make it stop.

“Life force, life force, bright and new,” Zephronis recites the chant, his tone grave despite its singsong cadence.“Magic untapped, power subdued.Feed the master, feed the need.Take the breath, plant the seed.”

A chill works over me and I stand from my chair.The room spins for a moment as the memory’s effects linger.“Stop saying that.”

“Do you know what it means?”Lorelai asks.

“I haven’t heard it for centuries.It sounds like a version of an old necromancer binding spell.”Zephronis remains calm.Frankly, it’s annoying when all I want to do is scream and tear shit up.“It’s a mark to claim you when your time comes.”

“What do you mean when her time comes?”Lorelai demands.

“He means that when I die, the necromancer has dibs,” I answer.My hands tremble.I keep hearing the sound, and it’s hard to concentrate.

Thump-thump.Thump-thump.Thump-thump.

“But...”Lorelai shakes her head.“Why?She was just a baby.”

“I think time has shown Tamara was never just anything,” Zephronis says.“I don’t think a necromancer could have known what you would become, but his goblins could have sensed the value in you.”

“My father knew,” I say, anger rising in my chest.“All this time, he knew exactly what was happening, and he didn’t say anything.”

“Davis knew about the supernatural threats, but I don’t think even he understood what the necromancers wanted specifically.He just knew you weren’t safe with me.”Lorelai tries to reach for my hand, but I jerk back.Why is she defending him?“This wasn’t the only threat.Werewolves and vampires came for you, too.And other magics.It was chaos.”

Thump-thump.

I begin to pace.I feel the monster inside me begging to be unleashed.

“From what I saw, Davis believed the threat centered around manipulating him,” Zephronis says.“He never heard the spell.”

What the wizard isn’t saying is that my father is a selfish person, and it probably never occurred to him that I could be in danger for any other reason.

“So what am I supposed to do now?Leviathan has been hunting me my entire life, and?—”

“We don’t know that for certain the necromancer is Leviathan,” Zephronis cautions.

“Oh, come on,” I snap, not caring that yelling at a powerful elder isn’t exactly prudent behavior.But really, what’s he going to do?Lock me up some more?Kill me?“The goblins tried to steal my breath as a baby, chanting about feeding their master my soul.Now he’s using Conrad’s ghost to torment me.My brother might be a dead liar who can’t be trusted, but we all know who has his spirit entrapped.He sent goblins to Costin’s home to attack me again after I’ve transformed into this...this… thisthing.”I gesture at myself in disgust.“It can’t be a coincidence.”

“You present a logical argument,” Zephronis says, surprising me.“But we need more information before confronting a necromancer as powerful as Leviathan.He has allies.Magical balance has already been disrupted.We cannot risk more turmoil until the mess with Thane and Elizabeth’s ritual is cleaned up.”

I pace the library, the floorboards groaning beneath my feet.The late afternoon sun filters through the seams in the curtains, creating pockets of light I instinctively avoid.

“Tamara?”Lorelai’s voice is gentle.“What are you thinking?”

“I’m thinking I want this to be over,” I mutter.“I didn’t ask for any of this.I didn’t want to be a hybrid.I didn’t want to be hunted my entire life by some power-hungry necromancer.I don’t want to play in goblin entrails.I don’t want to eat people or tear them apart.I don’t want to avoid the sun.I don’t want?—”

“Few of us choose our path,” Zephronis states, his ancient eyes following me.“But we can choose how we walk it.”

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