Page 68 of Better as It

“I have to.”

“You don’t. Not tonight.”

“Dia—”

“No,” I say again, firm. “Because you’re not going anywhere.”

He looks at me with those eyes that always give me more than I’m ready for.

But I hold his gaze.

“I will fight for you,” I whisper. “I will scream at doctors. I will drag you back to chemo by your collar. I will cook so many kale-chia-something casseroles your body won’t know what hit it.”

He chuckles softly.

“I will not let you go quietly,” I add. “So you don’t get to say goodbye tonight.”

He nods, lips tight. “Okay.”

I curl into his side, and he wraps the blanket tighter around us.

And for a while, the quiet doesn’t feel heavy anymore.

He talks to the baby again before we go to sleep.

He rests his head against my stomach and whispers, “You come when you’re ready. We’ve got you.”

The baby kicks like they understand.

I cry.

He kisses the stretch marks he once said looked like lightning.

And we fall asleep, heart to heart.

Tomorrow, everything might change.

But tonight?

Tonight we are whole.

And that’s enough.

NINETEEN

TOON

"The bear's paw leaves no permanent tracks, but its impact on the world endures." — Unknown

It starts just after dawn.

Dia’s pacing the hallway, hand braced on the wall, her other curled under her belly.

“You look like you got hit by a truck, darlin’.”

She glares, “thanks, Romeo.” She breathes heavy. “I don’t think these are practice anymore,” she says between gritted teeth.

I bolt up from the couch, where I’d been half-sleeping with one ear tuned to her breathing all night.

---