Page 22 of Redemption

“Stop apologizing.”

She balled the tissue up and hazarded a glance in his direction. “Why did you come here?”

“I was worried about you.” Ryder tilted his head back to the bed. “Can I sit again?”

Victoria’s eyes squeezed shut, but she nodded.

“I don’t have to. Never mind.”

She blinked and refocused on him. “What?”

“I didn’t mean to invade your space.”

Her head dropped. Ruined. He saw nothing but a ruined woman who was so fragile he misread what she meant with a simple look. “I didn’t—I wasn’t… I made a face. Or I didn’t mean to make a face.” She cringed. Such a mess!She couldn’t even get her words right. “I sound like an idiot!”

“You don’t.”

“I do. I’m not someone people worry about. Ever. I worry about people. That’s what I do.Did!I took care of people, and now look at me. I’m broken.” A sob caught in her throat. “I thought I was strong, and now, I’mthis.”

He came to her bedside, swooping next to her. “Victoria.”

“Something happened to me. Over there.” She sucked a breath as she collapsed against the pillows. “And I can’t.”

He put a careful hand on her forearm. “Listen to me.” He ducked down close. “I don’t know what’s the right or wrong thing to say now, so I’m just going to say this.”

He came closer so their eyes met. His head was almost level with hers on another pillow, but he held her gaze and didn’t let go.

“Please don’t tell me to get up,” she whispered. “To get back to my life.”

“I wouldn’t dream of it.” Ryder shifted so his weight was semi-on the bed, but he didn’t break their stare. “We brought everyone home, and every girl said you were their savior, that you put yourself in front of guards for them, that you made sure they had food. If nightmares struck, you coaxed them back to sleep. You were their guardian angel in hell.”

Her eyes burned again with tears, but she wouldn’t look away from his emerald ones.

“Whoever you are, love, wherever you’re from, you take as long as you need to get back the strength it took to become you, and I will stay by your side to help you if that’s what it takes.”

“Why?” Her voice broke along with a stray tear.

“Because I admire warriors.” He pushed away loose hairs she hadn’t noticed sticking to her tear-soaked face. “If you don’t want to eat, then get some rest. Real sleep. Not this fitful, nightmarish dozing Mia’s told me you’re fighting through.”

Her face fell, unable to lie to him when he believed in her for whatever confused reason. “I can’t.”

“Try again. For me,” he ordered softly. “I’m not going anywhere. You trusted me once to help you. Trust me again.”

Ryder shifted, placing both of his shoes on the bed and toeing them off. “I’m going to stay here, and if you need me, you’ll know I’m here. Unless you want to eat something first.”

“Not hungry.” She shook her head and snuggled back against the pillows. He put his steady hand on her shoulder, and she shifted, grabbing onto his forearm like it was a stuffed animal, and pulled it close to her chest. It was warm and muscular.Safe. She could almost feel his pulse, or maybe that was hers as she curled against him and could finally breathe.

He curled around her, and she breathed in the scent of his shirt’s detergent and maybe his cologne or deodorant as she finally fell asleep.

CHAPTER EIGHT

Victoria woke in the dark with her arms wrapped tight to her chest and her mouth sandpaper dry. Relaxing, she rolled to her side and stretched as the distinct memory of Ryder rushed back the same time she registered that the change in temperature wasn’t the lack of covers, but rather the lack of Ryder’s arm held tight between her breasts.

“Oh.” She jolted upright and felt all the blood rushing to her cheeks. “Oh! Oh, God. Ryder. I’m so sorry.” Face on fire, there wasn’t much to say that wasn’t an apology.

“Hey,” he mumbled as though maybe he’d been asleep too. The room was dark with a slice of light from the adjoining bathroom. “Easy.”

She blinked in the darkness as his hands sleepily ran over her body. She tried to find her bearings. What time was it? How long had they been asleep? Did she drool on the poor guy? But as her mind rushed to make sense of clinging to Ryder as she slept, she took into account that her muscles and mind didn’t hate her. Nothing moved like sludge, which had been the case before she’d gone to sleep, a tearful mess.

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