Page 29 of Only for Love

He hugs me close, murmuring against my lips. “You have no idea.”

No, I don’t. Not if he won’t tell me. Instead of pleading with him again, I press my lips to his.

He pulls back. “Emma, I messed up, but I have to wonder if everything happens for a reason. You’re going to college. You’ve got the world lined up—”

That’s what his future issue is? “Grayson. Stop.”

“It’s—”

“Listen.” Plastered on his chest, I lean up and cup his cheeks. Breathing in deeply and knowing the truth, I close my eyes and pray whatever hurts him can just heal, that whatever secret he thinks will cause irreparable harm disappears.

“Listening, baby.” Even in the dark, his eyes are the most beautiful shade of green I’ve ever seen.

“I love you, Grayson.” My heart seizes. Even though it’s the truth, it’s out there, and I can’t hide or take it back. “You’re my best friend, and I’m in love with you.”

His eyes search mine in the dark. Silence hangs. Then his hands cup my cheeks, too. We hold each other like that.

“Promise?”

I nod.

“God, baby.” He blows out, and I’m not sure whether it’s relief or terror. “I love you, too.”

Oh, yes. His words are quiet and sweet, but my heart and soul soar. Already lying on top of him, I hug him and bring my gaze back to his. His lips touch mine, and he kisses me. Strong hands rub my back, my bottom. He threads his fingers into my hair. His length hardens between us, and I’m wound so tight, my skin sizzles from the inside out.

“I want this, Gray. I’m giving everything I have to you. Please.”

His lips don’t leave mine. His hands hold me tighter. “Emma…”

I kiss him. “As long as you never say goodbye to me, we will always be okay in the end. I want you to be my first…” …and my last, thoughthatI don’t have the guts to say.

His soft eyelashes sink shut, our bodies meld, and he kisses me back. “I love you.”

“Never tell me goodbye.”

He stiffens, staring deep into me. Then he blinks, nods, and kisses, his tongue teasing mine. “Ems—”

“Never mind. No more talking. Please?”

With a look so long and deep that it steals my breath, he finally nods and turns me onto my back. It takes seconds for him to remove my bikini, and smiling, I shed him of his shorts. His mouth is on my neck, behind my ear. Warm air blows over us as our hands intertwine. He’s so careful with me, kissing me deeply, hugging me close.

“I love you, baby. I do.” One hand slips free of our grasp and teases between my legs. He sucks a long breath against my skin, and so do I. Gray teases me until I’m almost grinding against him, and then he presses fingers inside me. It’s heaven. It’s still so new, so insane, but I’ve never been more ready for more.

I’m moaning as he works me. “I’m so… Please. Please…”

His mouth meets mine. His hand guides himself close. The head of him touches me, and my heart’s pounding. I’m drunk for wanting this, needing him. And as he pushes against me, our eyes lock. “Yes.”

“Okay?” he breathes against me.

God, he’s holding back, and I’m surging forward. “Please.” It’s the only thing I can manage. I’m begging. Pleading. The sensation is amazing, the stretching painful. Uncertainty paints his face, but I’m nodding and urging.

“Oh. God.” Inch by inch. He moves into me, and my jaw hinges open, my back arching off the blanket. I gulp and gasp.

“Okay?” he says again. Restraint shows in his jaw.

“Don’t stop. God.” I hurt as much as I love this. The pain abates, and my hips flex toward his. He reads me. He always does. And slowly he slides deeper, only to withdraw and torture me again.

“Fuck me,” he groans. “Love this.”