Page 119 of The Bodyguard

“I did. Not in the way you’re thinking.”

“I know you didn’t,” Angela pressed.

“You can’t know that.”

“Why can’t I?” All she had was a theory based on toothbrush placements and Pham’s need for revenge. Still, she was certain Mylene hadn’t killed them.

“I’m responsible even if I didn’t pull the trigger.”

Angela ached at the thought of the hell this woman had been through. She ached for the hell she was still living in. If only Ibrahim were in the room. Angela tried to remember howIbrahim would speak to her. She searched for anything that he’d said to her over the years, but her mind filled up with panicky white noise. “Whatever Pham told you, it’s not true.”

Mylene’s brows furrowed. “Don’t—”

“I can’t tell you how many hours of therapy it took to be able to say that.”

Mylene’s lips parted, as though she was ready to defend Pham, but the defense didn’t come. Maybe a memory of Angela came to Mylene’s mind. Maybe Mylene simply didn’t have it in her to jump from the responsibility for the deaths to defend the murderer of her loved ones.

No matter what gave Mylene pause, Angela jumped in. “I know what he did to me was wrong. I know he wasn’t this old grandfather who really cared about me. But it still feels that way when I think about what happened.”

Mylene closed her mouth and tried to defend Pham again, but just as before, nothing slipped through her lips. Angela remembered the anger and defensiveness she had after she’d been rescued. No one understood her mindset, and now she couldn’t understand Mylene. “No one in the world understands the pain he put you through.”

Mylene grimaced, and a watery glassiness flooded her eyes.

“But,” Angela whispered, “I have a small idea.”

“No… You don’t.” The other woman’s chin dropped. “You can’t.”

Angela reached across the cold steel table and wrapped her hand over Mylene’s. “Abusive relationships don’t make any sense.” She held on when Mylene yanked. The handcuff chain clanked against its attachment to the table. Angela loosened her grip but didn’t let go. “There’s no logic to them.” Her throat knotted. “And I don’t know what you have gone through, but I know that your brain—at least my brain—tried to make sense of, literally, living in hell.”

Mylene looked away. She pulled her hands from Angela’s and balled them together. After swallowing several times, she rasped, “You can’t testify against him.”

Angela rolled her lips together. Empathy was hard when the situation was so damn frustrating. She would never be able to convince Mylene she understood, just like she had never understood when others had tried their best to relate to what she had gone through. “You told my mother’s office thatyou and Iare the same. That we’re trapped.”

“You can’t testify against him,” Mylene repeated.

“I was trapped. You were trapped. But not anymore.”

Mylene snorted. “Until he says different, we belong to him.”

“I don’t, and you don’t anymore.”

Desperation rolled over Mylene. “You don’t understand. But you have to listen. Don’t testify. Then we will both be free.”

“That’s not how it works.” She reached for Mylene again. Mylene shirked. “We’re both free of him now.”

“No. If you disappear—you don’t even have to die. No one has to kill you. You just have to go away. Not testify. He’ll know that I helped him. Don’t you see? That I took care of his problem”—her voice broke—“and maybe he will see that I’ve suffered enough. That I’ve done my penance. I can go back home. That’s all I want. I want my house. To be alone in my house.”

“That’s not how you separate yourself from him. Whatever forgiveness you’re looking for… it’s not in him to give.” Angela chewed on the inside of her cheek. “I’m going to testify, Mylene. Because I need the same thing you need. Release, and I’m going to be able to find it by saying what needs to be said.”

“No.”

“It’s what I have to do to survive my past.”

Mylene squeezed her eyes shut and shook her head tightly.

A lump knotted her words. “Mylene… it will be better one day.”

Mylene simply shook her head.

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